Friday, December 11, 2009

爱的寻觅

在人类的辞海里,没有一个字,比爱更沉重,更高贵,更能弹拨我们的心弦。圣经说,爱如死之坚强。又说,如今常存的有信,有望,有爱,这三样,其中最大的是爱。爱是永不止息。

爱的寻觅,是今夜话剧的主题,也是我们人生的主旋律。在人生的舞台上,我们没有人是旁观者。我们都是演员。

我们每个人,都是爱的结晶。是父母之爱,启动我们的生命。而我们接下来的人生之旅,最大的追求莫过于爱的寻觅。

从湖南乡下三十九岁母亲怀中的襁褓,到珞珈山上大学图书馆内直面美女的秋夜惊魂,引发少年人四年之久的的单相思暗恋,到毕业后天各一方的两年鸿雁传情,到洞房花烛夜的两情相悦,这是属于我的爱的故事。我靠发奋读书所取得的一点成绩来给自己壮胆求爱,打造灰男人(Cinderella Man)成功追到白雪公主的爱情故事现代版。但爱的寻觅结果并没有给我和她带来婚姻的甜蜜与幸福,直到我们先后回到真爱的源头里,成为基督徒。

圣诞节,正是上帝在人类历史舞台上展开的戏剧性一幕。令人惊奇的是,你我都有份于这个宇宙规模的、曲折动人的、爱的寻觅的悲喜剧。悲,是因为这个故事的主角付出了天大的牺牲与代价,但仍有人忽视漠视甚至轻视上帝之爱,与爱失之交臂。喜,是因为爱如此之广博深厚,有许多人成为蒙爱的儿女。

在这个宇宙性的爱的寻觅中,你我竟然是被爱被追的对象!而爱我们追我们的竟然是上帝的儿子耶稣基督。这是圣诞的故事最令人不可思议的。

我个人爱的寻觅向量是高攀,有点象癞蛤瘼想吃天鹅肉。这个时代更有许多人指望嫁入豪门。但圣诞,却是低就,是创造宇宙与生命的超自然之主,降卑来到自己的后花园,就是地球,寻找拯救失丧的人。

上帝的儿子向犯罪堕落后在死荫幽谷中挣扎的人类示爱,求爱。他怜悯我们的软弱,低就我们到不能再低的程度。

第一,低就到卑贱。耶稣基督虽然是万王之王,是不折不扣的天国君王,但他没有出生在皇宫里,他乃是诞生在马棚,被包裹放在马槽里。他与卑贱认同,为的是让卑贱者升高。他从灰尘里抬举贫寒人,从粪堆中提拔穷乏人。

第二,低就到平凡。他是一切美善美好美丽的创造主设计师,但他自己下凡来到地上作人,却选择不是一个英俊的美男子,他没有佳形美容,同时代的人看见他并不恋慕他。他与平凡认同,为的是把超凡的生命带到凡人中间。他说,我来了,是要叫人得生命,并且得的更丰盛。

第三,低就到奴仆。他不受人的服侍,却专一服侍各种有需要的人。他与奴仆的心态认同,为的是把上帝无穷的恩惠赐给人。他使瞎眼的看见,瘸腿的行走,长大麻风的得洁净,聋子听见,哑巴说话,死人复活。

第四,低就到贫穷。天上的飞鸟有窝,地上的狐狸有洞,但他连枕头的地方也没有。他与贫穷认同,为的是把天国赐给心灵贫穷的人。他宣告,心灵贫穷的人有福了,因为天国是他们的。

第五,低就到病患。他没有健康的体魄,他多受痛苦,常经忧患。他与苦难认同,这位平安夜圣善夜的圣子来,为的是把平安赐给在苦难中的人类。因他受的刑罚我们得平安,因他受的鞭伤我们得医治。他说,在我的里面有平安,在世上你们有苦难,但你们可以放心,我已经胜了世界。

第六,低就到被拒。他是生命之光,从高天来到黑暗人间,但黑暗却不接受光,把他钉在十字架上,让他立在天地之间,上不着天,下不着地。他与被拒绝不理解认同,为的是把光带到人间,让黑暗中摸索的人成为光明之子。耶稣说,我是世界的光。跟从我的,就不在黑暗里走,必要得着生命的光。耶稣对跟从他的人说:你们是世上的光。

第七,低就到受伤。耶稣在十字架上祷告天父:父啊,赦免他们,因为他们所作的,他们不知道。他与宽恕赦免认同,为的是得着被罪恶所捆绑不能原谅宽恕那些伤害自己的人。耶稣说,你们饶恕人的过犯,你们的天父也必饶恕你们的过犯。

第八,低就到舍身。耶稣受难前宣告,他若被举起来,就要吸引万人来归向他。的确,上帝呼召浪子回家,用的正是十字架苦肉计所表达的爱。他与牺牲舍命认同,为的是可以他死你活。这绝对不是司空见惯的丛林法则。

断气前他宣告:成了!

是什么成了,而非完了?是爱的寻觅完成了!

是上帝儿子主动把自己置之死地,好与人类最后最大的敌人─死亡认同,为的是开启从死亡通往永生的大门。

生命之主,当然无法被死亡所无限拘禁。耶稣死后第三天,在那个初熟节,第一个复活节的黎明,他复活了。他向我们真实地演示,死亡并非生命的结束,乃是永恒新生命的开始。耶稣说:我就是复活,我就是生命,信我的人,虽然死了,也必复活。凡活着信我的人,必永远不死。耶稣为人类开启了出死入生之门。

耶稣本是至高上帝的儿子,以血肉之体出场在人类历史中,最后在十字架上舍身流血,为的正是寻找在罪恶苦难和死亡中挣扎的我们。

爱我们灵魂的主,低就我们,向我们示爱,向我们求爱。你答应他吗?让我们都答应他的求爱吧。西方的求爱方式,是男人单腿下跪,拿着戒指盒,仰望他所爱的女子,问她你嫁给我好吗?

耶稣基督用他在十字架横木上完全展开的双臂,敞开他的胸怀,呼召我们悔改回归。你愿意从死亡之路上回转,成为永生上帝的儿女,成为教会也就是基督新妇的一份子吗?

有朝一日,耶稣基督会以王者的身份归来,迎娶所有接受他爱的邀请的人,完结人类罪恶死亡的历史,引进新天新地。如今他在天上,等候你自己情愿。

你愿意吗?让我们以祷告感恩的心来到主耶稣的面前,回应他对我们的大爱。

Monday, December 7, 2009

喜葬感言

周六上午,我跟妻子,还有好些位弟兄姐妹,参加刘淑和阿婆(姚红姐妹的外祖母)的喜葬,算是在人生的大学上了又一堂感人至深的课。之所以是喜葬,是因为她老人家寿高九十有七,于感恩节中午安息主怀。

从她后人的追忆里,我们在场的学生们透过眼泪分明发现一个圣徒级别的老人。她的一生完全可以用坎坷不平来形容。他出身大家闺秀,嫁给一个从事摄影艺术的基督徒。正值小俩口计划奉献传道之际,上帝接走了她的丈夫。她把奔丧的亲友教友捐献的所有款项,分文不取地转手奉献给了红十字会去支持其他孤儿的需要。二十八岁的寡母,走出两年郁抑的低谷,走过近七十年的风风雨雨。她不仅一手把三个小孩子拉扯长大成人,后来还承担起帮助抚养第三第四代的义务,深得晚辈们的一致敬重与喜爱。文革动乱时期,她备受无端的指控,吃尽干繁重体力活的苦头,又没完没了地写检讨,接受心灵的煎熬。从丧亲之痛中走出来的她,显得异常刚强,在那个黑白颠倒的时代,毅然决然地冲出心灵的桎梏,勇敢地活下来了。虽然她受到不公的待遇,但她总是以诚待人,又及时教育校正试图替她报复仇人的孙儿们。在那个物质匮乏的时代,她出于广博的母爱努力行善,积极帮补周围有需要的孤儿与穷人。她的善举令所有听者无不动容拭泪。

她大半生没有归家感,以至噩梦连连,直到十年前在若歌教会受洗归主。她是一位勤于祷告的阿婆,经常为别人而代求。为她追思证道的詹牧师,就曾常常蒙她代祷。詹牧师证道经文来自箴言书13章12节:“所盼望的迟延未得,令人心忧。所愿意的临到,却是生命树。”人生如列车抵达一个又一个让人等得心忧的中途站,继续追梦向前,直到人生终点站。可喜可贺的是,终点站不是句点,乃是开始,是生命树象征的崭新旅程。

参加完刘阿婆的喜葬,有一节罗马书的圣经经文跳入我的脑海:“凡恒心行善寻求荣耀尊贵,和不能朽坏之福的,(神)就以永生报应他们。”上帝显然是乐意施恩的主,虽然我们自始至终都无法参透上帝的作为。

正如喜葬最后那首阿婆所喜爱的诗歌(再相会)所言,如今阿婆结束了多难的地上人生,终于可以在永恒的天家,与她所爱的丈夫再相会,享受与上帝永远同在,以上帝为乐的全新人生。愿上帝继续祝福刘阿婆和她的亲人们。

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

从老虎的困惑说开去

老虎伍兹感恩节深夜在妻子挥杆训夫的谩骂声里驾车出走的当儿,闯了一个不大不小的祸,惊动了天下。倒不是说他因为撞损家门口路旁的消防栓与一颗树而被罚了寥寥一百多刀。那点小损失对一个一年挣数千万刀的高球能手,完全不在话下。他的损失也不在广告商那里,因为这事处理得当的话,老虎的曝光度应当可以不减反增,广告费理应飙升才是。

老虎的困惑在于他专业打洞不专一。虽然他走遍世界,到处挥杆打洞,成为世界第一的常胜高球手。但他忘了,他的私人果岭只有一个,他的私人高尔夫球场根本就没有十八个洞。古代皇帝拥有后宫美人无数的历史,在今天这个越来越民主,越来越养不起一家人的时代,看来是一去不复返了。

老虎的困惑其实正是常人的困惑。你若不相信的话,问问自己,假如艳遇的机会跑到你面前,你还能正常呼吸,正而八经,正襟危坐,正直不阿,正气凛然,正确处理吗?亏得咱们老祖宗有智慧,生怕后辈们忘德,造了好些以正压邪的四字短语充满中华辞海。

艳遇的机会从诱惑开始。不知何年起,色情业搬家到网上。垃圾电邮象雪片飘来,成灾成堆。虽然雅虎古狗新浪都设置了垃圾邮箱,过滤了绝大多数的垃圾邮件,但不免偶尔正常邮件与垃圾邮件被互换邮箱。我们大概多少都收到过一些标题醒目的黄色垃圾邮件:我很无聊想跟你谈,我发现了你,我很可爱,网上一夜情,想找本地不安分满足的妻子吗?另外有些邮件是骗钱的,说自己是非洲某富翁的遗孀,想转移一笔成千万的家产到外国,需要你帮忙开一个银行账户,然后给你可观的酬金。当然,等你傻乎乎地花了几块钱开户,告诉对方户头密码,那些钱可能就不翼而飞了。一个人丢几块钱是小事,成千上万的人上当捐钱就是积少成多的大事了。

中国古人说,食色,性也。人生来就有肚脐眼上面与下面的需要。基本次序是,温饱思淫欲。这不,老祖宗根据观察与经验都替晚辈们想过了想通了。地球人似乎都知道,食与色,应该有合适的道德界限。那咱们究竟该如何达成一个健康正常的食色兼备的人生呢?老祖宗告诫说,读书!因为书中自有黄金屋,书中自有颜为玉。不读书没有用,因为万般皆下品,唯有读书高;学而优则仕。这样,读好了书,不仅有金钱,有美色,还有官位,可谓钱权色俱备了。读书,似乎成了咱们开启人生美好前途的一把金钥匙。咱生活的时代,更是把读什么书讲明了,所谓学好数理化,走遍天下都不怕。如今咱们那辈人走遍了天下,多少人还是担惊受怕失业丢饭碗。都怪前辈当年说话没有买一诺千金的保险。

曾几何时,学好数理化的高调还没落定,学财经学管理学英文,蔚然成为新风尚。这不足为怪。盛传今年华尔街高盛雇员平均年度奖金超过七十大万。咱们这些当年学好了数理化的优秀学生们听到后难免不会没有一点想法的。那些奖金,竟然可以在与产品和服务不紧密挂钩的环境中,从钱堆里生出钱来!咱们老百姓的钱,以投资的名义乐意给人拿去生了钱,看着那点血汗钱走时间隧道的过山车,但无论牛市熊市,都帮助养活养肥了不少食利者。

现在读书似乎比以前还时髦。君不见,今天海内外的中国人,是多么地加倍重视教育啊。在国内更是有过之而无不及。天不亮,孩子们就上学了。天黑了才放学,回家吃完饭继续补习功课,周末假期也不例外,让那些课堂上可能留一手的老师继续挣外快。

我们真的只是为争取钱权色而读书吗?究竟为什么更崇高的目的而读书?《大学》开门见山说,“大学之道,在明明德,在亲民,在止于至善”。又说,“古之欲明明德于天下者,先治其国;欲治其国者,先齐其家;欲齐其家者,先修其身;欲修其身者,先正其心;欲正其心者,先诚其意;欲诚其意者,先致其知;致知在格物。物格而后知至,知至而后意诚,意诚而后心正,心正而后身修,身修而后家齐,家齐而后国治,国治而后天下平”。

究竟什么样的明德值得我们去明白呢?亲民(或新民)到底是什么样的人?人间真有至善吗?如果我们用圣经的启示来重新诠释大学之道,也许我们会得到发人深省的结论。明德就是上帝借圣经启示所显明给我们的他那善良、纯全、可喜悦的心意,亲民(新民)就是在基督里新造的人,至善就是基督所表彰的神圣真善美。基督是我们重生后明白并顺服上帝美好心意的起点,更是我们在他里面不断更新成长的生命之唯一楷模与标杆。

除非人有上帝儿子基督的那战胜罪恶权势的属天新生命,老虎的困惑仍然或多或少是我们的困惑。通往至善的路,本来就不是快易通。

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Lion, Lamb, and Light

Imagine you are going on national television in prime time as an America’s Top Talent contestant. You are asked by the judges to compose a song on the spot and sing it, on the theme of hope. What will be the lyric? How about the music score? Let me give it a try.

Hope is Peter Pan’s pixie dust; it gives you wings of faith to fly to Neverland.

Hope is the Hummer with 239 horsepower; it drives you across the uneven terrain of life.

Hope is the catchy word that enchants us; it gets Obama to the White House.

Hope is the sweet dream of a girl; it promises her a white knight prince in waiting.

Hope is the undying fire in a heap of ember; it rekindles the passion of your heart.

Hope is the assurance of tomorrow; it knows the setting sun shall rise again above the horizon.

Hope is the energizer bunny; it just keeps you going and going and going ….

Two thousand years ago, a man named Zachariah also sang his song of hope. He and his wife Elizabeth were advanced in age, without a child. One day, an angel of the Lord visited him while he was on priestly duty in the Temple of Jerusalem. To his disbelief, his wife would bear a child who shall be named John, aka John the Baptist. He would be the forerunner, the equivalent of an usher or an emcee of a Broadway show, for Jesus Christ who was to be born six months after John. On the eighth day after John’s birth, the day of circumcision according to Mosaic Law, Father Zachariah composed this song, a song of hope (Luke 1:67-79):

“Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, because he has come and has redeemed his people.

He has raised up a horn of salvation for us in the house of his servant David (as he said through his holy prophets of long ago), salvation from our enemies and from the hand of all who hate us—to show mercy to our fathers and to remember his holy covenant, the oath he swore to our father Abraham: to rescue us from the hand of our enemies, and to enable us to serve him without fear in holiness and righteousness before him all our days.

“And you, my child, will be called a prophet of the Most High; for you will go on before the Lord to prepare the way for him, to give his people the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of sins, because of the tender mercy of our God, by which the rising sun will come to us from heaven t shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace.”

This song uses two explicit metaphors to describe our Lord Jesus Chrsit: a horn of salvation, the rising sun from heaven. The song also has three implicit metaphors: Lion of Judah, Lamb of God, and Light of the World. Lion, Lamb, and Light are three reasons for our true hope in life.

First, this horn of salvation came from the household of King David in the tribe of Judah. Nearly 1900 years before the birth of Christ, Jacob, a patriarch of Israelites, prophesied by his deathbed the coming of the Shiloh, the Peace Giver, from the tribe of Judah (Gen.49:10). Judah was likened to lion’s cub. Jesus, the Prince of Peace, was referred to in the Bible as the Lion of Judah (Rev.5:5). Nine centuries later, Prophet Nathan relayed God’s promise to King David that a descendant from David will be King forever. This eternal King for the kingdom of God is none other than Jesus Christ, the true Lion King, the King of kings, and Lord of lords. Perhaps unbeknown to Zachariah then, this horn of salvation, the Lion of Judah is not only King of the Jews, but he is the King of all God’s people as well.

This Lion King was to suffer mortal wound, as animatedly depicted in the C. S. Lewis book and a recent movie by the same name of “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe”, and in another movie “The Passion of the Christ”. The Lion of Judah is also the Lamb of God. This is one greatest paradoxical truth of the bible: the King of the kingdom of God was sacrificed as the Lamb of God, in so doing, calling and winning the hearts of many lost sinners to become the citizens of the heavenly kingdom. John the Baptist, according to his father Zachariah’s song, was to present this Lord, the Lion King, to God’s people so that they will have the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of sins. This Lion King was to become the Lamb of God, by dying on the Cross to make the forgiveness of sin possible. As a priest, Zachariah probably knew better that the forgiveness of sin did not come easy; it involved the shedding of blood. In this case, it was the shedding of the precious blood of the Son of God. Have you accepted this Lion King of Judah, the Lamb of God, into your heart and received the forgiveness of sins? I encourage you to take the step of faith and accept him.

Zachariah continued in his song of hope: the rising sun will come to us from heaven. The Light of the World from another world was to come to us and make dwelling among us. That is the central message of Christmas: God the Son became God the Incarnate, the Immanuel, that is, God with us. This Light will dispel all darkness. Seven centuries before Christ’ birth, Prophet Isaiah prophesied in manifold clarity this Immanuel would be born of a virgin (Isa.7:14), as a shoot (Isa.11:1) “from the stump of Jesse” (King David’s father), and as “the great light” seen by “the people walking in darkness” and a light dawning “on those living in the land of the shadow of death” (Isa.9:2).The origin of this light is otherworldly, for his name is divinely revealing, “Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” (Isa.9:6). Jesus said, “I am the Light of the World. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” (John 8:12). We live in a post-modern world that marginalize, if not outright reject, truth of any kind and brand, especially the metanarrative of biblical truth. The evolutionism you learn at schools tries to upset your faith by trumping God’s truth that God is the Creator of the Universe and Life. The Light of the World has come, full of truth and grace. Jesus says, “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32). Have you seen the light of truth? In this light, have you seen you have lived in darkness for too long? Now it is high time to come out of the darkness of sin and become a child of light. Jesus also says to his followers, “You are the light of the world” (Mat.5:14). As children of light, we are to bear witness to the light and live a life that is full of light.

Brothers and sisters, our hope of deliverance does not rest on the power of any nation in this world. It comes from the power of the world to come. The horn of salvation is mighty and able to deliver us from the oppression of any dark force, be it injustice, sin and death. Those who take pride in the ever more powerful human armaments will be put to shame. The world’s powers, more often than not, have come out of the gun barrels, but they come and go, without exception. The power of the everlasting Kingdom of God comes not by human strength, but by the mighty arm of the Lion King of Judah. The King has come, in humility and love, and he shall return, in glory and power. Are you ready for this King’s return? Prepare a way in the hearts of our own and our contemporaries, just as John the Baptist did in his time. Preach the Word all the time, in words and deeds. Be creative. Be courageous. Never lose heart.

Brothers and sisters, our hope of salvation does not come from the self righteous acts of human efforts, a common hallmark of all the world’s unbiblical religions. Our hope of salvation comes from the righteous sacrifice of the Lamb of God. He alone is able to deliver us from the penalty of sin, the power of sin, and, ultimately, the presence of sin. Any human efforts will fall short of achieving eternal salvation. Who in our right mind would think that the gift of eternal life can be sufficiently earned by our limited and imperfect acts of charity trenched in highly questionable motives of ultimate self-serving? Come to Jesus the Lamb of God for the forgiveness of sins, would you?

Brothers and sisters, our hope of understanding does not come from ever shifting scientific conjectures and speculations. It comes from the Light of the World, who bears witness to God’s truth to this world of darkness. The truth is: we are all created in God’s glorious images and likeness. We are God’s image bearers. But we are sinners and fall short of the glory of God. Now the Light has come, we ought not to continue living in darkness. Come out of the dungeon and the closet, and embrace the fresh and warm sunlight from the high heaven. Walk on the sunny side of life. What darkness are you in? What secret life are you living? What immoral web of relations are you entangled into? Come out of it. Live in the light. As Apostle Peter said, “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” (1Pet.2:9).

Today, on the first Sunday of the Advent season, I implore all of us, behold our Lord Jesus Christ and become his. Believe the Lion King of Judah, and become his redeemed citizen of heaven. Believe the Lamb of God, and become a new member of his flock. And Believe the Light of World, and become his witness of light and life. Jesus the Lion, Lamb, and Light is the true hope of our life. God bless you.


写给小孔

小孔,请允许我越过大洋彼岸,向你问好。

你妈妈一位中学好友向我介绍了你的现状,希望我能写点什么给你,帮助你从郁抑症中走出来。我必须老实承认,这是一个难题,因为我毕竟还没有与你建立朋友与信任关系。一个十八岁的少年,愿意听一个四十五岁陌生中年人的话吗?但我必须假定你愿意听,不然我实在找不到更好的理由去码下面的方块文字。

我从那位基督徒朋友的简单描绘中,感觉你是一位有独立见解与思考的青年人。你从人生百态的细心观察里,深深觉得人生的荒诞与无聊。这绝对不是头脑简单的观察。这是真实的写照!如果我不是跟随基督的人,我很可能与广大世人一样,继续在灵魂的麻木中过追求功名利禄、醉生梦死、得过且过的世俗生活,或者选择出家,离群索居,寻找一片属于自己心灵的净土。我猜你会同意,人们这样的生活是既不多现实价值也缺少终极意义的。

人活着的目的到底是什么?

这是许多人问过的大问题。回答这个问题的关键不在人自己怎么说。关键取决于人到底从哪里来,又到哪里去。找对了人生命的来龙去脉,来去之间的短暂人生,自然就有了比较明朗的答案。我想我的这一推理是合理的。

极其幸运的是,我们不是漫无目的的进化产物。这是出自圣经启示的答案。至于我们求真为什么要押宝在圣经上,这就需要一番深入思考与研究了。包括我在内的许多人都如此思考过研究过。长话短说,圣经所预告所见证的历史上那位耶稣基督,划时代地改变了人类的历史,改变了人类的前途与命运。历史上值得我们花精力研究的人并不多,耶稣无疑是最闪光的一位。

圣经明言,人乃是按照上帝的形像与样式而受造的。这里的形像与样式不是指物质层面的,乃是属灵的,就如智慧理性与创造力,慈爱怜悯与公义心,等等。人受造,一方面是为了成为上帝的知心朋友,享受上帝赏赐给我们的各样美善的恩典,就如亲情友情爱情,阳光雨露美食,等等。人受造,二方面是为了让人彼此相爱,亲如兄弟姐妹。人受造,三方面是为了替上帝管理宇宙万有。这三方面,构成了人生的三重立体使命,即信仰使命(敬神),道德使命(爱人) ,管理使命(理物) 。人在宇宙中的正确位置,乃是一神之下(故要敬神,即把神当神,以神为乐) ,人群当中(故要爱人如己) ,万有之上(故要管理宇宙万物)

很明显,我们人类古往今来,离开上帝创造我们的心意相去甚远。圣经告诉我们,这乃是归因于人类离弃上帝,走自我中心的道路,在罪恶的深渊里越陷越深,不能自拔。上帝出于爱人类的大爱,在人类历史中兴起拯救的伟大工程。而救赎的中心人物,正是上帝的儿子耶稣基督。他降世为人,为的是成为上帝的赎罪羔羊,替人类流血舍身,赎尽罪孽,除尽罪恶,引进永生。耶稣来,为要寻找拯救所有失丧的人,要赐给我们一个崭新的生命,赋予我们人生合神心意的使命。耶稣基督,能够驱散我们心中的阴霾,把喜乐平安的阳光生命带给凡愿意接受他跟随他的人。

回到我们起初的问题:人活着的目的到底是什么?

人在地上暂时活着,最大的目的乃是通过认识耶稣基督来了解神对我们人类的精彩永恒计划,活出神造人的初衷:敬神,爱人,理物。

我愿意为你祷告,求神把你从暗淡无光的绝境带进永远生命的光明国度。如果你同意,我愿意与你交朋友。欢迎你与我直接联系。

一位关心你的基督徒

Friday, November 20, 2009

另类礼物,另类包装

(一)
买来的礼物
我舍不得拆封
直到皮面发黄如胴
一下两下三下
我撕破包装
礼物果然秀色可餐
值得细品慢咽

(二)
女皇慷她国民之慨
酿造一份精美礼品
我每天量出少许
沉入巴掌大的湖心
请柠檬陪老两口
一小口一小口地打捞恩情

(三)
皮嫰肉软
白里透红
心坚如骨
提亲的时候
嘴巴一直撇得斜斜的
不知是害臊还是不肯

(四)
除非推倒绿色围墙
你无法看见一包红色的水
拥挤在密不透风的屋子里
老王的施舍
让小狗都铭记

(五)
被烈日烧烤出来的饼干
竟然是鲜嫩的
另类吗哪
从天降下
成串
成束

(温馨提示:在这感恩的时节,我们生活的每一个细节都是感恩的理由。你能猜出上述短诗所描绘的上天惠赐我们享用的普通得极不平凡的种种礼物吗?)

Friday, November 13, 2009

Lord’s love lifts life’s lows

Have you ever felt downcast and downtrodden? The kind of defeat you get when you badly wanted to succeed? The kind of detours you did not plan or foresee? The kind of disappointment you have for both you and others when you really strove to do your best and be your best? The kind of despair you are entering into? Perhaps it is straight A grades to earn or a test not to flunk, a dream college to apply for or graduate from, a good paying job to seek or leave (voluntarily or not), a wife or husband to love or reconcile with, a friendship to forge or mend, a child to raise and discipline, a career ladder to climb up or scale down. Yes, we have defeats, detours, disappointments and even despairs, plentiful of them. I have a few big ones. I was prepared and expected to go to the very best college in China, but had to settle for less, months after my father untimely passed away, double setbacks for me then. I was hoping to become a university professor doing world class research, but ended up working in drug industry due to an event beyond my control. I was expecting a marriage that began with the typical fairytale happy union, but found myself bankrupt in love. Those are some of my life’s many lows. None of us, not even the Bible characters, are immune to life’s defeats, detours, disappointments and despairs. Peter is one such character. Let’s take a good look at him and his ordeals.

Peter’s life has a few low points. Remember Peter’s two fruitless night fishing expeditions, first recorded in Luke 5, which is in the beginning of Jesus’ ministry, and then again in John 21, which is in the end of Jesus’ earthly ministry after resurrection. On both occasions, Peter the fisherman and his friends labored a whole night on the lake of Gennesaret or Tiberas, that is, the Sea of Galilee, catching not even one fish! That is as low as any fisherman can get. It is in his life’s low point when Jesus first called him to follow as a disciple and become a fisher of man, and then reconfirmed the apostolic calling for Peter. In addition, we read about Peter’s walking on the water, only to sink deep in poor faith. We read about Peter’s great confession, which gets him the praise from Jesus, only to speak moments later on the devil’s behalf. Of course, Peter the braggart boasted his superior love to Jesus than his friends during the last supper, and Peter the brave heart chopped off a poor servant’s ear during Jesus’ nighttime arrest, only to turn into Peter the coward who denies out of fear, not once, not twice, but thrice, before the rooster crows, his association with and knowledge of Jesus after the Master’s arrest. Peter has to be disappointed with himself. So much so that he and six other disciples took a night off and went on a fishing expedition, again in the Sea of Galilee. Apparently all fish there that night got the advance notice from the Maker of heavens and earth to stay away from Peter and his cohorts and dodge their snarling net. The immediate context of our sermon text today is found in John 21.

A few days after resurrection, Jesus decided to appear to his disciples for a third time. This time, to seven of the twelve disciples. The Gang of Seven was fruitless in their nightlong fishing expedition. Something fishy must be going on. To their credit, they were quite persistent in disrupting the restful sleep of fish that night. Before dawn, Jesus appeared on the shore, asking them, not without some light sarcasm, “Friends, haven’t you any fish?” “No” was their terse and truthful reply. “Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.” Jesus instructed. And catch they did. A netful of 153 fish in just one cast! John was the first to recognize it was Jesus on the shore. Guess what Peter did. He jumped off the boat and swam toward the shore. Imagine Peter’s bittersweet emotions. Sweet, because the Lord is the lord of even fishery. Bitter, because Peter could not quite let go of his guilt in denying Jesus three times before the dawn of Good Friday. Make no mistake, Peter loves the Lord, despite all his failings.

Jesus did three remarkable things that morning to mend and lift up Peter’s broken spirit. First, he cooked breakfast for Peter and six other disciples. Notice before they hauled the net ashore, fish and bread were already being baked on burning coal. Nowhere in the text says that Jesus went to the early morning market for food. It has to be a miracle in the midst of another. I suggest fish and bread simply came out of thin air in that pre-dawn hour. Jesus demonstrated his care and love for Peter and others by providing what they were laboring for. We can imagine the atmosphere. It has to be a sobering mood. Silence, more than the sporadic sound of munching on fish and bread by the hungry seven, dominated the breakfast time. Peter probably could not get away with the thought: Hmm, after a whole night of fruitless labor, just one cast as instructed by the Lord netted 153 fish. What a miraculous change in fortune! To continue in one’s own effort and be fruitless, or to follow the Lord that provides all of our needs, that is the clear choice set before Peter and his friends. I am sure Peter recalled the first fruitless fishing in the same lake over three years ago. The two nights of fruitless labor serve as two bookends to Peter’s life. It has to invoke a sense of coincidence and awe. Once a disciple, forever a disciple. There is no turning back. The world behind me, the Cross before me, no turning back, no turning back. People in the world are overtly preoccupied with meeting the physical needs, forgetting that it is God who supplies all of our needs. If only we turn back to God and seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, all these things shall be added unto us. Just look at the animal planets documentary, water everywhere is teeming with lively creatures. Look at God’s gardens everywhere, they are filled with the produces of every kind, in very creative packages. Our lows in life arising from our excessive concern and worry can be effectively dealt with by knowing the love of God who is the Jehovah-Jireh, the Lord will Provide.

The second thing Jesus did to Peter was no less remarkable. He asked Peter three questions and reaffirmed Peter’s apostleship. If the breakfast met Peter’s physical needs, then the post-breakfast questions address his deep emotions and broken spirit. Jesus asks Peter by addressing his original name: Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these? Some theologians wish to attach this use of the original name to mean Jesus’ intention to awaken Peter’s bruised soul. The word love here is agapas, the kind of holy and godly love. Jesus was asking if Peter really loves Jesus more than these, meaning here his fisherman friends and fishing business. Listen to what Peter has to answer, sort of indirectly: Yes, Lord, you know that I love you. Here Peter used the Greek word phileo, the kind of brotherly love that is less than agape in both intensity and scope. Essentially, the humiliated Peter who thrice denied the Lord a few days ago dared not to speak about his superiority in loving the Lord. But he acknowledged that the Lord knew his heart and he indeed loved Jesus, just not on the same scale that Jesus loved him. Jesus clearly was pleased with Peter’s reply and issued the first order of his commission to Peter now reappointed and reaffirmed as the leader of the apostolic pack: Feed my lambs. Lambs (harnia) means little and immature baby sheep. Instead of being concerned with one’s own well being, Peter was to provide pastoral care by feeding the young and immature children of God with the word of God.

The dialogue did not stop there. Jesus asked Peter a second time, just like the first time, except omitting the words “more than these”: Simon son of John, do you truly love me? Peter did not waste any time in affirming as before: Yes, Lord, you know that I love you. Again Peter used the Greek word phileo to humbly reply to Jesus’ inquiry of agape love. Basically, he was saying: Yes, Lord, you know my heart, I do have some love for you, just not as much as you and I wanted to have. Jesus then issued the second order of his commission: take care of my sheep. Here Jesus used a different verb (poimaine) and a different noun (probatia). Poimaine means shepherd, tend, or take care of. Probatia is still little sheep, but a bit more mature and grown up than harnia the little baby lamb. Peter’s mission was not only to feed the needy lambs of God, but also to provide holistic shepherding care to the whole flock of God.

I know and you know well. The most dreadful has happened. Jesus asked Peter a third time, as if to remind him his denial of knowing Jesus three times. “Simon son of John, do you love me?” This time, Jesus asked Peter using the word phileo instead of agapas, as if to challenge him: Look, you have said twice that you have phileo kind of love for me. But do you mean it for sure? Do you even have that kind of love? The newfound joy of being reaffirmed and reappointed as the leader of the apostolic pack is now giving way to grieving in Peter’s heart. Peter replied, probably in breaking voice: Lord, you know all things, you know that I love you. If the Lord knows all things, why bother asking Peter to answer? We ask questions in the same vein: If the Lord knows all my failings and needs, why does he still want me to pray to him in confession and petition? Why the roundabout way? Brothers and sisters, talking to God about our failings and needs is God’s way of initiating the healing and blessing. There is power in letting out our concern, care, worry, oppression, depression, and suppression. The Lord wants us to bear his yoke, for his is lighter and easier than our own. Jesus issued a third order of his commission to Peter: Feed my sheep. Basically, Peter was to feed the lambs and sheep, and take good care of their physical, emotional, social and spiritual needs.

Jesus continued, with his prophetic words about how Peter would finish his earthly journey and die a martyr’s death. This is the third thing after feeding Peter and his friends with breakfast, after quizzing Peter for his love and reaffirming/reappointing Peter to apostolic leadership position. Following provision and three-fold pronouncement is prophecy or prediction. Peter will enjoy some time of freedom in shepherding God’s church, before he is bound up and taken to the execution ground for a final suffering, the kind of suffering that Peter was fearful to witness during Jesus’ last few hours. Uninformed people may think this is Jesus’ way of getting even with Peter’s denial. Far from it, this is Jesus’ way of assuring Peter that Peter as the reinstalled leader of the apostolic pack will offer tender care to the flock of God’s people and eventually walk the same walk of the cross that he once was afraid of and now he is emboldened to trod upon, by imitating the Lord who so loves him and whom he has readily confessed to love. As surely as Jesus predicted Peter’s denials after last supper, Jesus is now predicting Peter’s martyrdom after the lakeside breakfast. I must admit that knowing the detail of one’s final leg of journey on earth can be a depressing thought. I would be hesitant to know the manner that I will die someday, be it plane crash or car wreck, cancer or heart attack, botched robbery with murder, you name it. But in perfect love there is no fear. When one knows the eventuality, one takes time to digest it, get over with it and have peace about it. Peter’s immediate reaction to Jesus’ prediction is asking about John’s fate out of curiosity: Lord, what about him? In the closing lines of John 21, we hear Jesus saying to Peter: “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.”

On that post-resurrection, perhaps foggy, morning, by the lake of Galilee, a silent transformation is taking place. The Peter who once led the pack of 12 apostles badly failed after Jesus’ arrest by denying the very Lord that he had followed for three plus years. After a couple of post-resurrection appearances to the disciples, restoration of Peter’s apostleship is in order. Jesus chose a time after Peter’s second fruitless fishing expedition with six other buddies. Jesus did three things to start the process of healing and restoration. First, he prepared a miraculous breakfast by the shore, even though the fish in the lake were ducking from Peter’s net cast one after another throughout the quiet, spring night. But fish and bread, like any other good things in life, are all gifts of God. To acknowledge God’s sovereign lordship is the starting point to come out of life’s endless worries and lows. Second, Jesus had a remarkably short counseling session with Peter in the presence of six others. He basically went straight to the heart of the matter: do you love me more than anything, your social network, your professional career, even your own life? The little love we or Peter have for the Lord is valued by the Lord. We do not have to pretend that we have greater love than anyone else. We come to the Lord just the way we are, a sinner short of agape love and in need of God’s mercy and love, no pretense, no veneer of trumped up godliness, no comparison with others. God is willing to restore our relationship with him if we confess how little love we have. Our love, as little as it is, is by no means belittled by God. I did not know what true love is, until I came to know the Lord in the midst of my marriage struggles. You too can come before God’s throne of mercy and gain or regain his forgiveness and favor. Lastly, Jesus predicted Peter the martyr who would pass life’s ultimate test of faith: to die a martyr’s death in the imitation of Christ and for the glory of God. Church history tells us, Peter was crucified upside down on a cross in Rome, for Peter felt it was unworthy for him to die in the same way as the Lord. In life and in death, we belong to Christ. If death cannot deter the faithful, nothing in this world, not the lows of our life, can separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus. Just as apostle Paul eloquently expresses at the end of Romans 8.

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution, or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? … No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

To that we all say: Amen and amen!!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

改朝换代,还看今朝

今天美东下午四点,曾经在纽约证券交易市上以SGP股标翻云覆雨二十六年半的先灵宝雅制药公司(更早前身先灵制药则源于德国),终于被默克公司给默默地吞并而被革了命。成交价不高不低,四百一十一亿美元。如果有人在二十六年前花一千元买SGP,如今值两万一千元,用中学对数与指数换算,年递增率达13%,算是不错的投资。同时期默克股票的年递增率约10%,二十六年前一千元的投资如今值一万一千元,也不算差。别小看这3%的差别,二十六年的累积结果,导致两样投资收益差了整整一倍。当然,如果你不小心在十年前买了两个公司的峰顶高价股票,你的投资到如今会分别缩水50-62%。

处在改朝换代之交的我们,难免会感慨良多的。这倒不是因为担心旧朝天子与诸侯们流落他乡而生活无着。逾亿美元的元老遣散费,毕竟不是叫花子破碗里的一块铜板,即使买不起轻型波音787但过点滋润日子打打私人俱乐部的高尔夫球应当是绰绰有余的了。相反,值得关注的倒是咱们黎民百姓的生计问题。那十万张口,喝一口水都至少会让一条小河断流的。何况多半还有家人嗷嗷待哺呢。

咱们暂时能做的就是抚今追昔,继往开来。想当年,研究生毕业,准备找博士后,希望以后回国当教授。出于对蛋白质折叠机制的浓厚兴趣,我专门找到两个其姓翻成中文都带金字的名教授,一位在中西部盐湖城,一位在东部波士顿。在波士顿的金教授得知我在两难之间(是到他那里做研究,还是去先灵保雅上班),他坐在办公桌后,挥动他年轻而有力的右手,一字一句地提醒我:去工业界几乎是单行道,去了很难再回到学术界。我说我明白他的话。最后左思右想,因为对八九六四之后身份转换不确定而带来的过分关切,我还是执迷不悟地来到了工业界。这一来就是快二十年。

九年前,金教授也来到了工业界。他被默克公司研究所聘请,做起研发高管,仅次于后来被他如期接班的研究所总裁。如今阴差阳错,如果没有更多的柳暗花明,算是上天给我第二次机会,让他当大老板,让我替他做事。固然蛋白质折叠是个老大难的生物学问题,但制药何尝不是困难重重呢?一味药,从实验室到病床边,需要折腾十年有余,花费接近十亿美元。想取得及时成功喜悦的人,实在不适合在药业谋职。

我想起了老祖宗孟子的古训:天将降大任于斯人也,必先苦其心志,劳其筋骨,饿其体肤,空乏其身,行拂乱其所为,所以动心忍性,增益其所不能。我想,任何二十年的训练,应该离上天的训练计划是八九不离十了,因为人生有效期实在太短。至于大任为何,旁落谁肩,就翘首以待了。

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

理发店里的对话

几周没去理发店了。我一进门坐下,店老板就热情地打招呼:“都好久不见了”。我说:“是啊,自从上次来这儿,就没理过发。”

老板正忙着给一个男士剪发。接着问我:“现在还去教会吗?神学读完了没?”

“能不去吗?不去教会怎么行?”我连忙回答他,象是怕他以为我信仰变节似的。“神学差不多读了一半,还在读。”我补充道,心里想,这一个道学硕士需要九十多个学分,带职念神学,没有八年抗战的持之以恒,不容易拿下啊。

他那句现在还去教会的问题,一下子打开了我的话匣。我清了清嗓门,感叹地说:“如今好多人过日子,不知道人从哪里来,要往哪里去,来去之间为什么。假如人能多问几个为什么,不去教会也得去寺庙什么的寻找人生的意义。”

“人不是猴子变的吗?”一位女顾客主动答腔。我寻声望去,老板最近请的一位柬埔寨华人女性理发师正在给这女顾客剪发。理发师挡住了我的视线。透过镜子,我看出是位中年妇女的脸。

“那不是生物学家的答案。”我纠正她。“进化生物学家最多只是说,人与猩猩猿猴在很久很久以前曾有过神秘的,已经灭绝的,还没有找到的共同祖先。”

“活着不就是吃吃喝喝吗?”她接着回答前面的问题之一。

“吃喝固然是为了活着,但活着就是为了吃喝?”我不能同意她的说法。有人可能会说,活着就是为了吃喝玩乐得更好,事业更成功,家庭更幸福。但那仍然只是活着的部分重要内容。人活着有那些内容又是为什么呢?

“家庭工作忙都忙不过来,哪有时间去想那么多?”她说的算是实话。

是啊,大家的确是忙得够盲的,忙得缺少那种神圣的宁静与安息,盲得看不清人活着的真正价值与意义。“你若相信或者盼望有更好的活法,自然会安排得过来自己的时间去寻找答案。”我向她挑战。

“去教会的人也不见得都明白活着的意义。”她反戈一击。

“这,我承认是。”我无法不同意她的观察。“但正因为有不明白,才去寻找。”

“科学可以帮助我们找到答案。”看来她即使不是学科学的,至少也是信科学的。

“但科学之所以为科学,就在于科学不断发现错误,更新过去与现在的看法,以图逼近真理。”我希望她不要因为迷信科学来错失信仰。

她从座位上站起来,走向柜台付款。她个头不高,朴素平实,略显富态。按照最近人类进化生物学家对康州某地妇女的趋势观察,她代表人类进化的一个大方向(矮胖一点的妇女似乎更适合人类的繁衍)。

“好了,下次再谈。”她说完话很客气地往外走。我想,下次不一定来临。就冲着她离去的背影喊了一句:“还是去教会吧。”

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

瞬间的景色

大千世界有些景色需要咱们细心去留意,不然不是稍纵即逝,就是视若无睹。近些日子里有几样挥之不去的瞬间景色,容我道来与你分享。

一个多月前,我趁天气还不算太凉,决定花钱散步(这是我给某种球类运动起的名副其实的绰号)。那天碰巧与一个黑人弟兄切磋球艺,彼此都乏善可陈,离老虎伍兹的世界顶尖水平还有相当距离。但草地边上的松树引起了我的极大好奇,因为同一颗树竟然结了两种果实。有些枝上结的是一串串颜色不一绿豆大小的果子,我捏了捏,发觉不同的颜色代表不同的硬软成熟度。另一些枝上结的是一颗颗胡桃大小的坚果,酱灰色,表面形似大脑的沟回。我不知道松树的名字,但面对一树两果的奇观,心里涌起对上帝的赞美。我猜想,嘴巴小的鸟儿可以吃小的软的果子,嘴巴大的动物象松鼠可以吃大的硬的果实。上帝对万物的照顾实在细腻入微啊。我的耳边于是想起耶稣说过的话,“不要为生命忧虑,吃什么,喝什么。为身体忧虑,穿什么。生命不胜于饮食么,身体不胜于衣裳么。你们看那天上的飞鸟,也不种,也不收,也不积蓄在仓里,你们的天父尚且养活它。你们不比飞鸟贵重得多么。你们哪一个能用思虑,使寿数多加一刻呢。”于是咱无忧无虑地继续挥杆,付钱走路。

每次打到第十五号洞,就想起平生第一个小鸟(比标准杆数少一杆)是在那里打出来的。两年多了,再也没有在那号洞重复过当年的创举。可以津津乐道的,还包括第七号洞,今年早些时候差点打出一个漂亮的大鹰(比标准杆数少两杆)。那天木杆击球正着,球落点在果岭前不到一百英尺。接下来一个抛物线轻挑,球直奔旗杆标示的洞口,贴着杆子坠落进洞后极其罕见地被反弹出来,大鹰变成小鸟。记忆最深的是一杆进洞。那次在一个九洞训练场,第二洞练球中,侥幸打出一杆洞。人生有点象业余初学选手打高尔夫球,念念不忘的美好回忆实在稀少而珍贵。

今天一早,一只壮实的雄鹿优哉游哉地在我们家后院散步,我赶紧用手机隔窗抢拍留影。上周末,自家院子里有个机灵的松鼠,嘴里衔一颗从树上掉下的超大号果实,扬起长尾巴,看着我。我看着它,心生羡慕。原来天上还真的可以掉下粮食来的。松鼠得食,只需满地满树去搜寻去收获,而万物之灵的人类,需要一分耕耘,一分栽种,一分浇灌,一分收获,而且常常需要汗流满面,才得糊口。与松鼠和其他动物相比,人类处境着实举步维艰啊。植物就更不用比了,它们自个生产粮食,不仅自给自足,还绰绰有余地分享给不会制造粮食的动物们。上周末去教会的路上,车顶还让路边大树上掉下的一个果子给砸得铿锵作响。听见声音,我开怀地笑了。心想:秋实果然丰富得可以砸车啊。

几天前,我第一次注意到自家的小狗,会“坐走”(sit-walk),就是后腿坐地,前腿拖着已经坐地的身体往前爬行。我惊呼奇观,殊不知家人过去早已观察到小狗这一奇特的行走方法。从大学回家过周末的大女儿提醒说,小狗说不定用坐走在擦屁股。说得咱们一家人都笑了。前夜宴客,请在上海跨国公司研究所任职的海归朋友一家三口。小狗忙忙碌碌,从桌子这边跑到那边,奢望能分享桌上美食。狗的日子比松鼠还要容易。饿了,对着桌子或空盆喊一喊。渴了,掀一掀水盆。需要按摩了,躺到沙发上,肚皮朝天。而所有这一切高档消费,不需付一分钱。

上周五晚上,顶着毛毛细雨,爱之光团契开始了第一次的聚会,聚会地点位于与爱迪生以及南平田镇交接的劈势开太威镇的新德兰小教堂。可以容纳四百多人的教堂,迎来了首次聚会的三十几位成人与多位小孩。很明显,场地给了未来人数翻番成长的预备空间。马团长借用已故流行歌王杰克逊的话(This is it) 宣布新团契的开始。唱圣诗,听詹牧师的勉励,看着户外的秋雨,我想到圣经上所应许的秋雨之福。是的,上帝的恩典一如秋雨沛降,滋润人心。

Worship His Majesty

The only psalm that has ever been recited aloud to the whole world from the outer space is Psalm 8. On July 20, 1969, a spellbound world held its breath and watched Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin descending from Apollo 11’s lunar module Eagle and landing on the Moon. The spot where they set their feet is called the Sea of Tranquility. Indeed, it was a tranquil moment in the history of mankind. Ancient moon gazers fancied themselves with dreams of visiting the Moon. Chinese had the fairytale of a certain fair lady named Chang’e flying to the Moon and taking abode there. Poets of all nationalities penned numerous poems about the Moon. One Hebrew shepherd boy who later became the greatest King of Israel had a moment of tranquility in the Judea desert while tending his father’s sheep. As he gazed upon the Moon in the starry night sky, he could not withhold his spirit of worship to the Creator. He poured out his worshipful spirit in Psalm 8. Three thousand years later, Psalm 8 became the choice poem worthy of being recited after the first successful Moon landing forty year ago. Tonight, let’s pause in our busyness of life and share that moment of tranquility, first experienced by David and then by Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin. In so doing, let’s enter into the sanctuary of our hearts and bow down before our Maker.

In both the opening and the closing verse, David repeated this refrain: O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! Twice he used the Hebrew word ad-dir (ad-deer) to describe the name of God. The English equivalent of ad-dir are words such as excellent, famous, gallant, glorious, goodly, lordly, mighty, noble. It behooves us to conjure up images as recent as in the Election Night of 2008 when Barack Obama, the first elected African American President, took to the podium outside Chicago, to the thunderous applause of jubilant supporters and well wishers. A sense of unprecedented triumph and regality pervaded the whole park, whole nation, and whole world. If David did not continue to explain what exactly he meant by Addir in the following verses, we would be left guessing what exactly the majesty of God is. So let’s read on.

You have set your glory above the heavens.” God’s glory, so foreign to us and so immense for us to grasp, is above the heavens. The same David, elsewhere in Psalm 19, says, “The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork.” In essence, the heavens are but an extension, or seepage, of God’s uncontainable glory. God’s glory radiates through his handiworks in the heavens. The same Moon and stars that charmed David the shepherd boy transmit to us an even richer meaning in this age of scientific discovery. Our Moon and our star, the Sun, in the solar system, are only two of a hundred billion planets and stars in our Milky Way that measures 100,000 light years across. Furthermore, the Milky Way is but one of the hundred billion galaxies in the cosmos whose expanse can only be traversed for nearly 14 billion years even at the speed of light. Such enormity of the heavens is beyond our comprehension and reflecting the glory of God who takes the heavens as his throne and the earth as his footstool.

Curiously, in verse 2, David said to God: “Out of the mouth of babes and infants, you have established strength because of your foes, to still the enemy and the avenger.” Perhaps David witnessed in his childhood that he and his play pals praised God. During David’s time, the Philistines were a constant threat to the people of Israel. We all know the famous story of a young David standing up to the Philistine giant by the name of Goliath and killing him with a sling and just one of five stones. God’s strength of victory was surely upon the young David. But David here was talking about suckling babes and infants whose mouths were usually after milk insatiably. The poet was using the literary device of exaggeration to portray the praiseworthiness of God for his superpower by even those adorable but powerless babes and infants. We get a better picture of this verse in Matthew 21:16. There on Palm Sunday, Jesus went into Jerusalem riding on a donkey, receiving praise and honor from people lining up the street (before many of them had a dramatic about face five days later). Jesus chased out money changers and vendors selling pigeons from inside the temple of God, and healed many sick people. Many young children shouted or cried out: “Hosanna to the Son of David!” The religious of the day, the chief priests and the scribes, were indignant on hearing this. They chided Jesus by saying: “Do you hear what these are saying?” Jesus answered them, by quoting none other than Psalm 8:2 (possibly the Septuagint version), “Yes, have you never read, ‘Out of the mouth of the infants and nursing babies you have prepared praise’?” Perhaps unbeknown to David, almost a millennium later, his prophetic poetry would be heard of its fulfillment from the lips of those children witnessing the Passion Week ministry of Jesus the Son of David. I gained a deeper appreciation of verse 2 early this year when I read a report from China. A government scholar formulating new religious policy guideline reported his observations after spending a full year traveling through much of China and doing in-depth research on the status of house churches. Despite being an atheist, he had some very favorable things to say about the underground house churches, with an outspoken concern for the secrecy forced upon them. One recount in his report etched in my memory. Showing video clips of children singing praises to God in a house church, the scholar saw a new generation with gleaming hope in those young Christian children. He described them as “beaming with sunlight”. He said tears swelled up in his eyes. Brothers and sisters, God has indeed ordained strength or praise from the lips of babes and infants, even in China where his house churches are under constant harassment and sporadic persecution. God used those children beaming with heavenly sunlight to silence God’s enemy and avenger, and even drive one atheist scholar to tears.

In verses 3 and 4, David felt a strong sense of unworthiness when he discovered the worthiness of God as displayed in the heavens, the Moon and the stars. So unworthy, David had to resort to the rhetorical refrain of synonymous parallelism to adequately express his feeling of gross inadequacy: When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? Worship is the most natural response of man when man is confronted with God’s greatness evidenced by his mighty handiwork. Man can only prostrate before the Maker and feel unworthy of God’s providential care. George Smoot III, a UC Berkeley professor, won the 2006 Nobel Prize in Physics for his contribution in understanding the cosmic microwave background radiation. In describing his team’s discovery in the early 1990’s, he likened the map of the embryonic heavens by the cosmic background explorer satellite as looking at the “fingerprint of God”. The stars we see and not see in the sky came into existence because of the handiwork of God. Now scientists can trace back in time and find the earliest fingerprint of God. Science is discovering more and more how awesome our God is! Another scientist, by the name of Francis Collins, led a group of some 3000 scientists a few years ago in deciphering the human genome, the book of life that makes human biologically human. Lately, he published a book “the language of God”. It is this instruction book with over six billion letters, jointly given by our parents, that drives both our embryonic development and everyday living. It is this language of God that literally speaks us into an embodied existence containing no less than ten to the 27th power of atoms in over 10 trillion cells of various kinds, including about 100,000 hairs on our head (yes, God has numbered them), over 200 bones that frame us to stand upright before God, 40 billion capillaries that, altogether with arteries and veins, make up nearly 100,000 miles of rivers of blood within our body (that is four times the circumference of the earth’s equator, arguably the longest river on earth!). If all of the DNA molecules in our body were stretched and stacked end to end, it would have to travel back and forth 8000 times between Moon and earth! If we only care to gaze deep into the heavens, we would find the fingerprint of God. If we only care to gaze deep into our own cells, we would find the language of God. God’s glory is splendid and resplendent, everywhere we gaze into.

David’s feeling of unworthiness before the Creator God was intensified furthermore in verses 5 to 8: Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field, the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas. If the high heavens that bears the fingerprint of God proved unbearably humbling to the poet, then the fact that God created us in his own glorious image and likeness and ordained us to have dominion over his creation is simply mind-boggling, eye-opening, breath-taking, heart-throbbing, gut-wrenching, and knee-shuddering. The most unthinkable has happened: “Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.” Wow! Wait a minute! The majestic God of immeasurable glory and honor has created man just a little lower than heavenly beings (me·'e·lo·him), variously translated as God (as so rendered in some translations’ footnote) or angels (per Septuagint), and crowned him with glory and honor. Not only is God’s fingerprint on display in the heavens, his very image of glory and honor is being borne by man, the imago dei. When we survey the history of mankind, we see an enduring struggle in our dominion over nature, often for our selfish ends. To say that we have lived up to this lofty aspiration as God’s glorious image bearer and stewarding caretaker is simply not true to our collective experience. So was David wrong then? Absolutely not! David’s prophetic words were first and foremost fulfilled with Jesus, according to the author of the Book of Hebrew 2:6-8. Apostle Paul further predicts in 1Corithians 15:27-28 and Ephesians 1:10 the ultimate dominion over everything under Christ.

But to conclude that Psalm 8 is prophetic about Jesus only would undermine the richer meaning of this poetry, since the bible also clearly teaches that we are co-heirs with Christ (e.g., Romans 8:17). It is in Christ that we find the ultimate meaning of God’s creation and redemption. It is by Christ and for Christ that the heavens and earth were created. As part of the creation order, indeed the crowning jewel of the creation, mankind is to exhibit God’s glory and honor in all we are and all we do. Unfortunately we have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. In God’s mercy and grace, he sent his one and only son Jesus Christ to come into the world and redeem mankind from sin and death. Not only will we be saved from the penalty, power and presence of sin, we will be saved unto eternal life as the divine image bearers and co-heirs with Christ. The new heavens and the new earth will be our new, eternal home, wherein we shall directly gaze upon the glory of God and fulfill our caretaking stewardship. This is the gospel of Jesus Christ, the greatest and best news there is under heavens and on earth. Brothers and sisters, let’s learn from David a lesson of worship. David gazed into the starry night in the moment of tranquility and found God’s glory beaming through not only the Moon and stars, but the image bearers of God as caretakers of his mighty creation. Let’s pause during each of the four seasons and marvel at the changing colors and thank God for adorning our planet earth with such rich diversity of liveliness. Let me give you a few tips in case you wonder how.

In this fall season, walk in Central Park or your neighborhood, hike in Bear Mountain, pick up a fallen leave and inspect its veins, the highway that once transported the carbohydrates made by the process of photosynthesis. Some of the leftover sugars helped staining the leave reddish. Ponder on the fact that all of the foods consumed by the millions different kinds of living species in our biosphere were ultimately made by the green plants, God’s Food Inc. And give thanks to God for his generous provision year after year to humans and sparrows and fish and sheep and oxen. Amazingly, God’s Food Inc. takes an extended Sabbath break in the fall and winter every year, without causing real food shortage overall. The fall foliage is like a holiday celebration in flying colors. Go stand by the bank of Hudson and delight in the tapestry on both sides of the mountain valley. Savor the moment of tranquility. God is in the fall season. Do not miss his show.

In the winter season, light the fireplace of your heart and let it snow, let it snow. Walk in the snow country and kiss the snowflakes that gently fall on your face and lips. Taste it, the ultra pure, chilled and shapely disguised water supplied free of charge. Click to fasten your snow board or skiing board but let loose your inhibition at the top of the trail. If you dare, pick the daredevil black diamond trail and have a free fall. If not, crisscross the cross country trails at a leisure pace. If too timid, take the snow tubing and ride along with it. Regardless, recite your favorite Psalms and praise God for making mountains and opening the storehouse of snow. God is real cool and chill. Worship him for being so cool. You be cool too.

In the spring season, pay attention to the budding trees and blooming flowers. Observe their growth in slow motion. Gently touch the green buds and wipe off the morning dew. Analyze the color patterns in the flower and understand that all types of colors in varying shades and intensities are finely painted by an invisible artisan programmed internally within the book of life. Even the crayons are self manufactured, distributed and deposited with the right amount and in the right time and location. Nose up to a flower and breathe in its aromatic fragrance. Watch how a butterfly flutters and dances her way to a flower or a bum bee skillfully lands on the narrow strip of the petal, before they collect the nectar and become the unwitting facilitators for flowers’ cross fertilization. God has to be an artist par excellence. God is in the spring. Let your singing of praise and adoration to God bloom like wild flowers in your heartland.

In the summer season, check out the beaches and enjoy the giant Jacuzzi by the name of Atlantic or Pacific Ocean. Know that the whirlpool is being agitated by the joint gravitational pulls from the Moon and the Sun. If you have ever felt envious of the rich having indoor Jacuzzi within their oversized mansion, then think again while you are immersed in God’s super-sized, outdoor Jacuzzi stirred by the Moon and the Sun. And feel super special being so pampered by God. In the coolness of a summer night, count the stars in the heavens as if you numerate the blessings from God. Watch cereus blooming in the night and folding up its petals and withering in the morning, as I am fortunate to witness a few times at home in August since 2004. Our life on earth is as brief as the night-blooming cereus, yet it is deeply rooted in God’s mindfulness of us even before the foundation of the world, it is lived in the present age to know our Maker and Redeemer, and it is to be lived endlessly throughout eternity in the presence of our Maker and Redeemer. Let us echo David the psalmist’s refrain: O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!

Friday, October 23, 2009

秋天的孤鹭

你独自照镜子
镜中颠倒的世界在变换颜色与打扮
而你总是披一身素衣
喜欢用修长的腿
让镜里镜外不安

我早晚都奢望你出现
你很少爽约
你家园边上楼房的老总
正发愁往哪儿藏金子

先后某一天
我跟老总都不再路过
除非你也搬家
随他去
或是跟我走

我会继续等你
在镜子的这边
或者那边

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

是结束,更是开始

人生有一些里程碑,是一段旅程的结束,也是新的旅程的开始。十月的金秋,我有两样结束,两样开始。

第一样是工作。不多几日,贡献青春快二十年的公司终于要画上句点了,即将被新的默克给吞并了。记得刚进公司时还是满头黑发,一脸朝气的热血青年。拿到录用通知后曾与妻子一起到“热得啦不是特饿”(Red Lobster)开心吃龙虾庆祝,似在昨日。现在对镜自观,深深体会岁月如梭。头上黑白越来越分明。晶状体变形聚焦动作迟缓,太远看不明,太近看得晕。肺活量年年减产,而血压节节攀升。没有腰缠万贯,但内部组织重组起哄,显摆另类富有派头。唯一还保持得不错的是一副好牙齿,竟然一个也没有坏掉(大概部分归功于小时候吃糖的机会太少)。乖乖,现在总算弄明白了,为什么不明身份的亡魂可借保存基本完好的牙齿来鉴定。

第二样是团契与信仰生活。本周五,我要离开生活了十七年之久的若歌教会乡音团契,与一群居住爱迪生的同胞,共同开创若歌教会的又一个新团契———爱之光(EDISON LIGHT)。目的很简单,与凡愿意的华人同胞一起分享来自耶稣基督的恩典之爱与真理之光。离开乡音大家庭,还真有些舍不得。但更大更新的使命,催逼我们忍痛割爱。

第一样的结束不在我的计划与掌握之中,开始新的旅程更是充满了变数与挑战。第二样的结束是经过深思熟虑与精心策划的,开始新的旅程同样充满了未知与机遇。

人生之路,就是不断结束与不断开始的总和。儿时的玩伴,如今天各一方,友谊留在那片充满稻香的田野上,展灯共读的书桌旁,结伴垂钓的堰塘边,打仗砍柴抓蜈蚣摘蘑菇的山林里。高中大学研究院的同学,合在一起不久就离开了,各奔东西世界的五湖四海,为生计打拼,为梦想而活,筚路蓝缕,披荆斩棘。求学期间结识了不少良师益友。走得最近的自然属于曾经搅动少男心事的那位永远的少女。如今,她为人妻人母,我为人夫人父。流年往事,怎堪回首明月中?爱过,恨过;胜过,败过;是过,非过;赚过,赔过;乐过,悲过。五味人生,一应俱全。

如今,曾在一起工作服侍过的同事同工,也共同面临某种结束与开始。诚然,地上最大最后的结束要等到人生谢幕之时。德国的潘霍华牧师在临刑前的黑暗中,对纳粹监狱里的牢友说:这是结束,但对我而言,也是新生命的开始。

以这样的信念来面对旧的结束与新的开始,该是一种什么境界呢?何不来到本属于你的“乡音”与“爱之光”,让我们一起享受上主之爱,沐浴上主之光。

Friday, October 9, 2009

核糖体之谜

今年诺贝尔化学奖授予了解开核糖体(Ribosome)三维原子结构的三位美国科学家,离开核糖体首次在电子显微镜下被一位罗马尼亚科学家(诺贝尔奖得主)粗线条地观察到,过去了短短半个世纪。人类认识自然规律的过程,正是从不知到粗线条地知道,再到精细而高分辨率地知道的不断发展过程。生命起源的一个关键,正是核糖体的起源。套用某哲学家的名言(没有蛋白质,就没有生命),我们可以理直气壮地说,没有核糖体,就没有生命。

先简单科普一下核糖体的基本功能与结构。核糖体作为一个纳米车床或平台,与其他的细胞活性分子(包括作为蛋白质合成信息模板的信使核糖核酸,运送氨基酸的转移核糖核酸,启动/延伸/释放蛋白合成的蛋白因子)精诚合作,负责细胞蛋白质的生物合成。原核与真核细胞的核糖体基本结构类似,都由两个纳米零件构成,一大一小。大的形似皇冠,是蛋白合成的催化中心,小的则象一只伸出来紧紧握住皇冠(以及信使核糖核酸链)的手。大的由两三根长短不一的核糖核酸扭麻花链与三十几或四十几种蛋白质钢条交织而成,小的由一根长的核糖核酸扭麻花链与二三十余蛋白钢条交织而成。真核的核糖体比原核的更为复杂,细微结构也相当有别,正因为如此,那些锁定核糖体为靶物的抗生素才有抑制细菌或真菌生命而对人类细胞网开一面的药用。

下面我们思考核糖体的起源假说。科学家发现,真核细胞中线粒体(动力发电厂与内源凋亡指挥部)与叶绿体(生物圈食品总公司)自己拥有的核糖体与原核细胞的核糖体更相似。这导致一个所谓内共生假说,在生命起源之初,原始的细胞们在相咬相吞的过程中,偶然地发现,合作是双赢的开始。于是它们化干戈为玉帛,决定形成互助组或合作社,而被吞的细胞决定安分守己,放弃绝大部分的基因,只留下极少量的基因,特化成一个骨干细胞器,专事能量(线粒体)或物质(叶绿体)的关键代谢。

姑且假定想象力丰富的内共生假说满足我们的某种好奇,也不无道理,我们还是面对一个棘手的问题,当初原核细胞的核糖体又是如何起源的呢?因为核糖体这个精密复杂的纳米细胞器同时拥有荣辱与共的几种核糖核酸与几十种蛋白质分子,而生产核糖体自身的那些蛋白质又需要核糖体来完成,这就产生了一个是先有蛋还是先有鸡的两难问题。于是有人提出了所谓核酸世界的假说(先有具有催化功能的核糖核酸,然后有蛋白质以及核糖体)。但麻烦的是,核糖体内的核糖核酸之催化功能有赖于其中蛋白质的结构性支持。那我们不得不假设,当初的核糖核酸特别有能力,无需蛋白质的支持就勇谋兼备地带来了从无生命到有生命的革命性转折。那些早期的核糖核酸先锋们,不仅摇身一变,成为储备遗传基因的脱氧核糖核酸(DNA),而且还可能无中生有地催生了早期某些关键蛋白质的出场,又与越来越多的蛋白质组装成一个纳米平台——核糖体,更有效的合成后来所有的蛋白质。生命之歌,就这么偶然地给吹响了。

我们今天回头看看咱们身体里的核糖体,对当初的那些分子进化先行者们,不得不致以某种说不出的感谢。只是很可惜,它们无法接受我们跨越时空的感谢,满有子欲养,父不在的惆怅感。

不多几位拥有十的二十七次方(一千亿亿亿)数量级的原子所组成的一百多斤的科学家,用与时俱进的头脑与科技手段,在短短半个世纪间解开了合成蛋白质的纳米机器的原子结构。另外有人还大胆地推测当初的起源出于某种巧合或偶然。你我就这么来了。请听诗歌:不要问我从哪里来,我的故乡在远方,为什么流浪,流浪远方,流浪。

无神梦呓下的流浪还在继续……

Monday, October 5, 2009

永生之钥

这个周日美东时间午夜之后,三位美国科学家(其中两位女中豪杰)被告知,他们因发现染色体末端结构与修复末端的酶而荣获今年的诺贝尔生理与医学奖。

刚巧,这个周六我应邀去纽约州一个华人教会作中秋节布道。我根据新约福音书中两位犹太人(年轻财主官和律法师)先后请教耶稣如何得永生的故事,以“永生之钥”来展开。

如果永生之钥的关键在于解决自救与神救的千古冲突,从无人真正做到敬神爱人之至善的人类共同绝望中解放出来,以活脱脱的罪人身份凭信心接受上帝借着耶稣基督白白施舍的大救恩,那么,维持细胞持续分裂增殖生命力的染色体末端的修复酶似乎向苦于永生无着的人类抛了一个媚眼。毕竟,生生不息的癌细胞擅长细胞分裂过程中染色体末端的必要修复,而所谓正常细胞则在有限度的分裂传代过程中,逐步丧失了这种永葆青春的自我修复能力。

人类体细胞中的二十三对染色体,好比两套二十三册的生命全集,在细胞反复传代复制的生命过程中,这两套生命全集(被DNA复制酶系统)每读一遍,就似乎让卷首与卷尾(染色体末端)给消磨薄了一些。如果不加修复补偿,每本书就变得不复或不忍再读了。就好比咱们小时候,领了新书,需要小心包装,免得一学期还没过半,书本就已经消磨得无法继续顺畅地翻阅了。

这是否意味着,如果有朝一日人类有本事从胚胎发育期就开始按部就班地严密控制每个细胞的染色体末端的消磨并及时加以修复,同时限制所有其他导致细胞衰老死亡的种种原因,人类就可以延年益寿甚至越来越有可能逃避死亡了呢?

延年益寿还真不是白日梦,如果新一代的人类更进一步决定放弃互相残杀的举动,又悉心地保护好生活的环境免受各种对生命有害的污染。他们需要担心的倒是,如何安排千年游戏人生,重温受造之初的高寿境界(见圣经创世记第五章中关于从亚当夏娃开始的头十代寿高数百岁的人类远祖之记载)。人类败坏扭曲的理性总是与上帝作对的。可不是吗?当人们兴奋地把染色体末端的修复与延年益寿的新前景挂钩的时候,忘记了自己曾经对圣经关于早期年高数百的寿星们的记载如何嗤之以鼻,极尽挖苦与讽刺之能事。我想,当三千四百多年前只活了一百二十岁的摩西,面对同世代流浪倒毙旷野年岁不过七八十而已的犹太同胞,替上帝作笔代刀写到创世记第五章时,可能犹豫了片刻,做了一番思想斗争。我猜他在想,人类头十代真的有那么些数百岁的寿星吗?但他显然按照上帝的默示而如实写下了,休管后来的短命人类弟子们的说三道四,毕竟上帝所造的亚当夏娃基因蓝图理当完好无损,堕落后每况愈下的不良后果还需要一段时间才凸显出来。

至于脱离上帝的永生是否可能,就值得深思与质疑了。即使生命的小环境可以尽善尽美,生命的大环境(太阳系,银河系,整个宇宙)必须合作,支持生命在地上和宇宙中无限繁衍下去。科学家早已预期,这个宇宙如果不是走向大撕裂的结局,也至终会在热力学第二定律的紧箍咒中走向热死。更何况,万物生长所依靠的空中巨型核聚变反应堆——太阳,在宇宙热死以先,焚烧殆尽核燃料之后,也会日薄西山,红日不再,太阳系进入黑暗的世纪。人类千秋万代的永生梦想在哪里实现呢?

写时间简史的霍金教授就直言,人类的希望在外太空外星移民。我们要追问的是,哪个外太空与外星?如何移民?

拿撒人耶稣已经给予了最响亮可信的回答。有耳可听的,就应当听。

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

最后的旅程

星期一上午十点,布兰奇堡殡仪馆。黄子嘉牧师读经祷告完毕,在场的亲朋好友同事,盖棺前最后一次与时安弟兄的遗体告别。

八位西装革履的弟兄,协助抬棺到灵车上。十几辆车,开着前灯,闪着紧急告示灯,鱼贯而出,缓缓而行。警车在202号公路上两个关键转弯口拦路,替护送的车队开路。车队继续往北行驶在287高速公路上,下到Mt.Airy大道,进入地势居高的Somerset公墓。无风,头上只有几朵白云游弋在蓝天。

在场的四十余人每人拿到一枝玫瑰花,或站或坐在公墓内的小教堂里。黄牧师讲完简短信息与祷告,房克忠弟兄带领众人唱诗,一首“亲爱主,牵我手” ,催人泪下。谌效东弟兄祷告完,我们一个个走上前,把花放在棺木上。离开前,我刻意作了一个亲吻的手势,好像不得已目送时安弟兄远去的身影,而自己,暂时逗留在此岸世界。

回到Somerville一家自助中餐馆吃过午饭,好几位再次到殡仪馆,帮忙搬运花圈与照片到教会,并准备好晚上追思礼拜的场地。

晚上七点钟,追思礼堂已经座无虚席,逾四百人之众。九点钟结束后,来宾排队与亲友一一握手,长达半个多小时。追思的细节毋需赘述了,定将深印在每个人的心灵里。

时安弟兄是出自我们中间的王储,行完地上最后的旅程,捷足先登,到万王之王那里履新去了。

是为记。

Sunday, September 20, 2009

送你,我的弟兄

看你躺在那里
我的眼眶湿湿的
总有一天我会当主角
再现今天的一幕

暮鼓或晨钟定格的那刻
我应声脱下地球服
象落胎的赤子
乘痉挛的天风飘然出塞
塞外柔光万道
塞内人声鼎沸
哭声、歌声、祈祷声

断了脐带的新生儿
以第一声婴啼临盆
牵挂那个没有光明但有血水的世界
直到被钉痕依旧的双手怀抱
躺卧在恩典峰与慈爱岭之间
安歇在生命河滋润的青草地上

塞内的亲友
围着那件不敷缝补的外衣
追忆它的主人
如何承受数十载的风霜寒暑

满脸笑靥地从梦中醒来
我发现你我果真安家在塞外

Thursday, September 17, 2009

从时安的思竹谈起

两年前的夏天,我去看望大病初愈中的时安弟兄。他请我帮他一件事,就是把他入夏前写的那篇“思竹”散文翻译成英文,他想寄给刚上完大一的女儿泱泱看。我也特别喜欢那篇文章,就爽快答应下来。不难想见,时安弟兄思竹以寄情,思竹一文当为他所写许多脍炙人口的文章中自己的最爱。

如果按照时安弟兄给过去写作班员的挑战,用一个字来描写他的话,我想,竹,应当是最适合不过的了,虽然几天前继红姐妹曾恰如其分地用”山“来形容他体魄的伟岸与人格的坚毅。

记得小时候,自家后院最远端,父亲刻意种了一片竹林,在“北风那个吹,雪花那个飘“之季节,好象一道绿色防风墙。长大成人,自己当家买房后不久,也刻意从普林斯顿华人教会的刘铭辉牧师家移栽了几根竹子,栽种在后院最远端。十多年来,每逢春回大地,成片的春笋从四周八围探出头来,成了人鹿共享的美食。时安弟兄爱竹出名,我们自然乐意与他分享后院的出产。从孩提时代步入中年人生,竹子总是与我形影不离,达到了“居却不可无竹”的境界。时安弟兄一篇思竹美文,让我对竹产生了更深的敬意,从竹生发出更多的思考。每天面对后院的竹林吃饭,时安弟兄的思竹篇又不时浮现在脑海,好象听见他声情并茂的朗诵。

人生百年之后,难免时过境迁,物是人非。我想,我留下的,除了那片卫星拍得到,古狗搜索得到的竹林,还有什么是可以长存的呢?

这些天来若歌与乡音团契弟兄姐妹对时安弟兄的追思,已经提供了很明确的答案。

附录:时安弟兄“思竹”美篇与信达雅有待继续改进的英译。

**********************************

思竹

周時安

江南多竹,于是江南人爱竹。

佳室必背竹而居,有清山抱之,有绿水环之。

居之于竹楼,坐之于竹椅,卧之于竹榻,行之于竹筏。饥时以竹筒为器,置米于其中,辅之新嫩笋尖,烹成米饭,清香鲜美,久置不坏。出门时戴一顶由竹子编成的斗笠,可以遮风、挡雨、蔽日;闲来时折一杆新枝截成两段,一段製成鱼竿,一段製成短笛。持鱼竿者,是邻家的老翁,此刻临渊而坐,无我无物地凝钓著一江山色;而短笛则由溪中牛背上的牧童悠悠扬扬地吹出,悠荡得使群山起伏,激跃得令流水驻足。美哉,朦胧中好一幅《江南牧笛垂钓图》。

风起,竹林吟唱,或低沉似呜咽如泣如诉,或高亢似放歌如鸣如颂。雨后,竹林清新,春笋叠出脆绿,浓妆淡抹烟朦。夏日行路,躲入幽静的竹径,毒辣的日头顷刻似成了羞涩又顽皮的少女,不时透过疏密相间的竹叶探入林中,与你玩起捉迷藏的游戯。行一路清凉,洒一路斑驳,习习微风袭鬓发,沁沁潮息润心脾,顿消暑意。

古来文人多偏爱于竹,而甚于爱树。以竹入画可为主题,而以树入画却多是陪衬。画树常曲,且繁生槾枝。而画竹则挺且直。或浓墨或淡染、或顿提或勾划、或饱润或枯瘦,即成一幅墨竹图,老杆新篁,葱翠欲滴,神形兼备。历来写竹者众,其中姣姣,当推文同、高克恭、赵孟頫、管道升、郑燮,而其中又以清人郑燮为最。文人喜竹,不仅因爱其形,更是因爱其品:竹 -- 中空且有节。中空又谓虚心,虚心有节乃文人之向往为人处世之高尚境界。待人应虚心,处世需持节。怀纳川向学之谦心,忧国忧民之忧心;持文人之道义之名节,民族泱泱之气节。如竹之谦虚诚恳却不卑躬屈膝,于顶端处迎高风,由躯身中见亮节。食可以无肉,居却不可无竹,是为不俗(苏轼语)。故此竹并梅、兰、菊同被恭入花木é四君子û之列。

虚心持节也应是基督徒之德行。凡事谦卑,持守真神之道,虽于当今之世,实为不易,然爱竹者可常以竹品醒之。

予生于江南,故此爱竹。今家安于北美,憾鲜于见竹。成此《思竹篇》,以为遥念,竹韵兮,竹风兮,如竹兮。

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On Bamboo (Shian Zhou)

South of Yangtze is never short of bamboos. Small wonder, people there love bamboos.

A nice abode almost always parks in front of a patch of bamboos, nestled at foothill and flowed around by river.

Imagine: dwell in a bamboo hut, sit on a bamboo chair, lie down on a bamboo bed, and travel by a bamboo raft. In time of want, add rice in a bamboo container, steam with fresh and tender bamboo shoots, you get aromatic meal that lasts. In time of travel, wear a bamboo hat to shield from wind, rain, and Sun. In time of leisure, pluck out a bamboo stalk and sever it, the long piece for fishing pole, the short a flute. The elderly neighbor sits by a pond, holding the freshly cut fishing pole, abandoning himself to the wonder scenery reflected in the water. The young lad straddles a buffalo, making melodies with the bamboo flute to beckon the wavy mountains and quiet the dancing creek. Such is the sight in the painting “Fluting and Fishing in Jiang Nan”.

Imagine: a forest of bamboos sing with the ruffling wind, sometimes sobbing to a mere whisper, other times shouting into a deafening thunder. After baptism with spring rain, bamboos shoot up out of the turf like mushrooms. On a sultry summer day, bamboos become your hiding place, while you are being chased by the mischievous Sun that relentlessly seeks you out in the thicket of bamboos. Such is the cool way of travel on a path dotted with flickering patterns of sunlight, all the while the breeze finesses my hairdo and the moist soothes my heart. What fun of summer chill!

Ancient pens love bamboos more than trees. Bamboos take center stage in paintings, whereas trees are often peripheral. Trees branch out whereas bamboos stand erect. Thick ink or light touch, sudden tailing or sharp bending, full or lanky, thus becomes a painting of bamboos, old and new, luxuriantly verdant, vividly lively. Many have shown a knack in writing about bamboo, the elitists are but a few. The learned love bamboo, not only its outward appearance, but inner qualities as well. Bamboo is distinguished by its hollow chamber segregated by nodes. Hollow symbolizes humility, and node connotes integrity. Humility with integrity is a lofty goal to be attained in life. One must show humility with moral integrity when dealing with people. Be humble and open enough to embrace differences and yet morally upright to hold onto foundational principles. Be humble as hollow as the bamboos, yet stand the ground as firm as the bamboos. As Su Shi put it wisely, to eat can be without meat, but to live shall not be short of the bamboo spirit. Thus, bamboo ranks with plum, orchid, and chrysanthemum as the four gents of flowers and trees.

Humility with integrity is also fitting for Christian conduct. Being humble before God and obedient to his way instead of the worldly wisdom is not easy. Those who love bamboos may learn a lesson from its character.

Born and raised south of Yangtze, I am a lover of bamboo. Now that I sojourn in North America , I lament the scarcity of bamboo. With this reflection, I recompense myself by the fond memory of bamboo. Behold bamboo and its charm and character.

(Translated upon the author’s request)

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

今夜昙花为你盛开

她走出仙人掌
撑开洁白的折叠伞
凝视黑夜
呼吸九月的哀思
急切打听你的去处

我蹲下身子
扶着她直不起来的腰
向她耳语
你去了仙人的世界

满溢约会前穿戴的香水
她若有所失地点头
问我你的新址

我说除非步你后尘
谁也无法再见到你

她决定天明前去追星

Monday, September 14, 2009

有感于昨夜为时安弟兄的五十庆生会

你走进花园州的若歌
献上三件朝圣的礼品

你用细腻心房里焚烧的激情
冶炼方方块块的黄金
出炉一如珠矶
掷地有声
绕梁不绝于耳根

你用宽厚的大手
把葱姜蒜剁成碎泥
爆炒或慢炖
猪牛羊或鸡鸭鱼
安静地彩排在瓷盘与瓦罐里
等候纷至沓来的美食家们
色香味俱全的立体检视

你用微笑的眼神
赢得童叟的尊重与信任
无论是SARAH还是DAVID
都说你是他们的BUDDY
张伯伯还是李伯母
都不好意思让你抢先插队落户在天际

文艺是你载道的高脚酒杯
厨艺是你待友的大碗盛情
人格是你爱主的生命结晶

你留下三件精美的工艺品
在我们心中的画廊
也在那日不落的永恒

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

遍插茱萸少一人

昨夜,乡音团契祷告会,创下32人参加的最高记录。原因很特别,时安弟兄不在我们中间了。

今天是阳历09年09月09日,一组很特别的数目字。我不由自主地想起唐代诗人王维。他十五岁时(AD715)离家进京。两年后的重阳节(阴历九月九日) ,思亲情切,写下流芳百世的七绝:

独在异乡为异客,
每逢佳节倍思亲。
遥知兄弟登高处,
遍插茱萸少一人。

如果弟兄姐妹祷告的馨香算是茱萸的话,那么香气四溢的祷告会的的确确少了时安弟兄一人。

作者在繁华的京城求取功名,称之为异乡,自比为异客。这种想法其实与圣经的视野不谋而合。圣经称圣徒在地上是寄居的客旅(来11:13)。信心之父亚伯拉罕在应许之地作客,好像在异地居住(来11:9)。信神的人羡慕一个更美的家乡,就是在天上的(来11:16) 。如今,时安弟兄回到了那个大可羡慕的天家,我们这些暂时在地寄居的客旅,反倒有了“王维情结” 的孤独感,觉得自己孤孤单单地继续留在异乡为异客了。

佳节思亲情更切啊,更何况我们亲爱的时安弟兄,刚走两天,他五十岁的生日再等四天即临。我们如何不日思夜想呢?在今天夜晚来往神学院的两个小时车程中,我思念最多的就是我们的弟兄。时安弟兄曾思考过身体康复后读神学。他对学习圣经的一贯认真态度是有目共睹的。几年前,他作教会文书执事,开始在全教会积极推动每月背经计划。如今乡音团契承接这一良好传统,每周五晚上团契主席都不忘带领大家读经背经。以后背经,咱们会继续想念时安弟兄。

少年诗人王维怀想远在山西老家的四位弟弟,在重阳节携带香气浓烈的茱萸登高望远,可惜亲人中少了他一人在场。如今,我们仍在异地作异客,遥想已然登高上达天庭的时安弟兄,我们何尝不是一次又一次发觉,我们还真不习惯过那种少了时安弟兄参与的地上教会与团契生活。或者按照诗人的意思来推论,如今时安弟兄与爱他的主同在,那一大群簇拥主宝座的圣徒与圣天使中间,是不是也少了我们这些还在异地作异客的天路客呢?难怪使徒保罗在写给腓立比教会的监狱书简里说,“因我活着就是基督,我死了就有益处。但我在肉身活着,若成就我工夫的果子,我就不知道该挑选什么。我正在两难之间,情愿离世与基督同在,因为这是好得无比的” (腓1:21-23) 。我们姑且把这种复杂情结命名为“保罗情结” 。

从王维情结升华到保罗情结,天路客算是学得人生真谛而可以毕业了。时安弟兄正是这样一位先我们毕业的圣徒。

Monday, September 7, 2009

念你─缅怀时安弟兄

时安弟兄,你走了,匆匆地走了,走在2009年劳工节假日的早上,回到永恒安息的居所。

你大概不知道,乡音几位同工,正在悄悄地为你准备一个惊喜生日派对,今晚借开主席团同工会的良机,在华荣与婉乔的新居,提前六天为你庆贺知天命的华诞。然而,主的意念高过我们的意念。订好的蛋糕,今天无法去领取了。生日气球,也不必着急去购买了。露佩大姐的电话,突然中断了我正在构思,写了一半的生日贺诗。

陈牧师师母,以及好些弟兄姐妹闻讯后,先后赶到你在桥水市的家。我们用眼泪、静默、祈祷、圣诗,来陪伴你的爱侣素如和你的爱女泱泱。我们再也没能与你谋面相谈,唯有围着你,按手在你被隐藏的身上,为你祷告。我隔着布摸着你的右手,苦于无力把温暖传给你,唯一能安慰自己的,是主耶稣基督掷地有声的宣告:“复活在我,生命也在我,信我的人,虽然死了,也必复活。凡活着信我的人,必永远不死。” 这样,你如今仍然活着,只是暂时安睡在主的怀抱里,有一天,你会复活醒来,大家要再见面,永不分离。

我们一一细数与你同在的最后时日。你的身影,出现在上周末的退修会里。其间周六深夜的临时同工会,你出于爱心,发表你的真知灼见,好让乡音在爱之光团契成立后,继续稳健地发展。周三晚上教会的祷告会上,再次见到你,也喜闻你铿锵有力而优美的祷告。周日的主日崇拜,是我最后一次见到你。今晚本来有的欢聚,因你突然与世长辞,不得不延期到天家相会的日子。

昨夜,你与素如姐妹最后一次牵手在街坊,漫步在夏末秋初的季节,感受同心同行的美好温情。等不到秋叶泛晕,你就被接到一个更美的家乡去了。在这突然临到的别离中,我们可以稍微慰藉的是,你走得特别平静安稳。你在梦乡中化蝶,飞向了那个梦寐以求的故乡。

亲爱的弟兄,你曾经精心策划,击键歌咏的若歌,正紧锣密鼓地迎接三十而立之堂庆。而你,曾经码出一篇又一篇高贵优雅的方块文字,记述发生在教会生活的点点滴滴。若歌,是你灵程的起点,等几天,也将是追忆你生平的最后驿站。蒙圣灵无形而有力的带领,你自个找到教会来慕道,又很快地融入了乡音团契。你曾是乡音团契的主席,教会文书执事。你是我们中间公认的乡音名厨,第一笔杆,若歌文豪。深信有一天,我们还会读到天国快讯中出自你涓涓笔墨的绝唱。

亲爱的时安弟兄,你安息吧。

Friday, August 28, 2009

阿拉啊斯加

你见过小鸟展翅高飞,第一次离开鸟巢,实现天高任尔飞的高大境界吗?听见搅动鸟巢的大鸟在一旁喝彩吗?

长女马上就要离家上大学了。我发现心中不舍。想起自己上大学的经历。

我第一次离家上大学是1980年的夏末。从老家坐公交车赶到长沙,又连夜从长沙坐火车往武汉赶。次日清晨,快到武汉时,对座一位名叫郑刚的大学新生,来自广西,前往武汉工学院读书。他热情地送给我一个苹果。这是我平生第一次吃到苹果,意义非同小可。我谢过他,就狼吞虎咽地吃下。晓风吹进车窗,凉凉的。终于到了学校,感觉身体累,可能有点感冒。吃苹果与伤风感冒于我而言,密不可分。从此,我再也没有吃苹果,直到来美留学,发现苹果是相当可口的水果。甚至有西谚称, An apple a day keeps the doctors away。不知道只有一面之交的郑刚同学在天的哪方,只有默默祝福他。

读完书,上了班,也不忘中午在公司食堂买苹果吃。直到近年食物普遍提价,食堂吃一个等于自己从超市买两个,不划算,开始自觉自愿地禁吃了一段时间的苹果。最近,又开始吃苹果了,好歹也尽自己一份贡献,刺激经济复苏。

为庆祝长女上大学,我们选择她生日期间,也刚好是我与她妈结婚二十三周年之际,全家人去阿拉斯加旅游,方式是坐海轮。五朵昙花盛开的次日,我们全家老少七口(包括岳父岳母),结伴与几家朋友,一同出游。周六先飞到西雅图,参观波音工厂,感受一个传奇的创业故事。周日下午,海轮驶离港口,直奔阿拉斯加。余下的就如西谚所言,The rest is history, 是过去了的历史。

经过两周时间的沉淀,我试图回顾一些难忘的经历。早晨与妻子在甲板环道上快速散步,晚上睡在老岳父的上铺,竟然没有被他呼风唤雨的鼾声影响睡眠。反过来的影响我就说不清了,反正岳母的耳根不会清静,没有此起彼伏的深夜二重奏就算运气了。

有次去牌房,发现角落一位从长沙移民来美的老妈妈,正在给另一位伯母读圣经。出于好奇,我拿着早上晨更刚用过的圣经,走过去打招呼。原来,两位老人六十余年前是中学同学。后来一位去了台湾,一位留在长沙。时过境迁,两位十年前在西雅图见面了。嗯,人生就是如此啊。大家各自转了一大圈,又走到一条路上来了。

印象特深的是在阿拉斯加首府我与几个青少年一起玩林间滑索(Ziplining)。当向导的其中一位大学毕业生,在几岁时与妹妹从韩国一起被一美国家庭领养,从加州毕业后,今夏来阿拉斯加打工挣点盘缠,计划明春去新西兰,从事他所喜爱的摄影艺术。最惊心动魄的当然是登上最高的一个木台,第一次被挂在滑索上。那个木台的名字叫信心的飞跃。是啊,民无信则不立嘛。

有一整天八小时,我们驱车游山看水,沿途不时泊车拍照留影。如今长女电脑屏幕的照片,就是我们家在高山间的湖畔,在布满一种我暂且命名为火焰花的花丛前的合影。可惜啊,那张拍得不错的照片,得益于我,但摄影师自然不在照片中。遗憾啊,自己不在可以有的空间里。本来,人生就是这么些遗憾的累积。

沙文鱼在浅滩戏水,成为棕熊的猎物。在回程的山路上,我们目睹一对棕熊,从山坡下来横行马路,估计是去下水抓鱼裹腹。但我一声惊叫,吓得它们回头就跑上山,爬到树上。

冰山是见过的,在冰川之行里。可惜,冰山不多见,冰化得不慢。半小时功夫,我们就目击数起坠冰溶海的场面。

加拿大维多利亚和花园,是我们最后一个停靠的地方。出租司机来自拉托维亚,已经在那儿住了快二十年。平日开公交车,一周两次开出租。据他说,我们靠岸的前一日,海浪特大,有一条海船无法靠岸,损失商机三十万。

周一回到公司,在电梯里遇见同事。有个同事说恨阿拉斯加,因为曾经在那里两周旅游,每日都下雨。我哪里恨得起来,七天的旅游,天公特别作美,天天天晴。

Saturday, August 8, 2009

惊艳啊惊艳






昨夜从团契聚会归来,喜闻乐见家里养殖的昙花第三次盛开。这里的闻,当然指闻味。那个幽香啊,沁人心脾,堪比金银花,胜于夜来香。这一次开了五朵金花,在月满之夜(满月之后的第二日),并立秋之日,同时绽开,名符其实的“月下美人”(昙花别名)。容我称之为“月下秋波送暗香”。

上次开花,算是一枝独秀,2008年八月24日之夜,时值北京奥运闭幕之日,意义非凡。第一次开花,算是梅开二度,2004年八月12日,雅典奥运前夜。

泰山大人用虎口方可丈量最大一朵花的直径。出于好奇,我细数了花瓣。里外两层各七瓣,洁白纯净,交互重迭,组成花冠,形同仪仗队,捧出里面同样白净,几乎与地面平行的花蕊束。雄蕊末端逆地心引力而上弯,向天举目,呈现黄色的花药,好像祭物。冲破众雄蕊的围追而鹤立鸡群的,应该是孤傲群雄的独一雌蕊,其柱头末端呈辐射风轮状,有十四片,中间的洞口,通往子房。花冠外围的花萼,白里透红,向花冠反方向极度弯曲,好像幕后英雄,要刻意回避赏花者的注目。支撑昙花的花柄从叶片生出,呈扭曲的L形状。

今早起来,发现五朵昙花仍有五成开放程度。这样,昙花至少开了十二小时,超出往年。等不久它们完全闭合,邻街的老王会如约来摘除,拿去熬汤喝,滋补滋补青春不再的身体。

是啊,咱们一如午后的太阳,难免日薄西山之感。风景无限好,只是近黄昏啊。昙花虽然只有数小时的风光,它仍然忠实地活出造物主赏赐的艳丽生命,何况按照上帝的荣美而受造的人,岂不更应该摈弃罪恶,彰显那大写的人生,活出人生的真本色,就是基督的生命来着?

你说呢?

Sunday, August 2, 2009

惊险啊惊险

今天早晨出了一个不大不小的车祸。

不大,是因为我死里逃生,安然无恙,在这里写博相告。不小,是因为有一个车胎被撞爆,车祸完全可能造成更严重的后果。

九点半刚过,在一路毛毛雨的洗礼下,我从一号公路转接往东布朗士维克镇的Ryders大道。转弯时速想必过快,在弧形弯道上失控,车体向右边树林冲出去。我试图操纵方向盘,但无济于事。车身越过路基,好像被提起来,打了一个180度的急转弯,停在路基树林旁仅有的一小片草地上。我打开车门,发现左后轮胎爆了。所幸,我毫发无损,车体也竟然没有撞到树林上,当时也没有来车跟在后面,算是一部车的撞车事故。车祸不久,有许多车陆续开上弯道,路人用不无吃惊的眼神看我站在车旁打电话。

九点33分,我拨打第一个电话,给前往布道的当地华人教会的牧师,无奈他手机未开。我赶紧打电话给妻子,告知她车祸状况,请她帮我查询教会的座机电话。后来教会的吴弟兄接话,知道我需要教会派人来接我,就和迈可弟兄一起过来。在他们过来的路上,我勉强把车重新开上弯道,走了一段路,停在附件一家加油站,等候来接的弟兄们。因为十点开始的主日布道在即,吴弟兄先接我去教会,迈可弟兄独自留下,帮我换备用轮胎,再径直开到教会。

我满怀感恩的心,走上讲台,宣讲上帝的救恩,呼召同胞把流浪的心回归给赐生命的上帝。

Sunday, July 26, 2009

精彩啊精彩

话说本周末小女Stephanie所在的蓝色精灵全明星女子垒球队,在翠西领队、娇滴为书记员、格里格为首的三位教练的带来下,以及家长亲友的喝彩支持下,参加今夏最后一个邀请赛,乃南平原镇的Summer Slam (夏天势来猛)杯。参赛队伍除了东道主外,有来自北爱迪生的蓝色精灵队,科龙尼亚旋风队,桥水市黑豹队,西田镇风暴队,梦若镇迅雷队,福乐明顿火焰队,以及特拉华谷闪电队,共八支劲旅。周五晚以及周六,每队比赛共三场,按照成绩来派种子队序,参加周日的决赛。这是一个期待值很高的比赛,因为在七月中科龙尼亚邀请赛的四分之一决赛中,决赛前三连胜后自以为稳操胜券的蓝色精灵队被排名靠后的南平原镇全明星队打败,饮恨空手而归。

蓝色精灵队周五晚首战科龙尼亚旋风队,以五比二取胜。周六下午,应战桥水市黑豹队,以五比六告负。接着以十二比一大胜西田镇风暴队。遂以两胜一负的战绩,被列为第三号种子队,参加周日的决赛。桥水市黑豹队也以两胜一负的战绩,但因输球稍少,名列第一。特拉华谷闪电队与东道主南平原全明星队,也以两胜一负的战绩,分列第二与第四。

话说桥水市黑豹队,去年在克拉克镇邀请赛的半决赛中,淘汰了蓝色精灵队。蓝色精灵队卧薪尝胆,试图东山再起,卷土重来。Stephanie练习投球,更是精益求精。周六再次相遇,赛程刚过半,蓝色精灵队以五比三领先,教练派上秘密武器,由Stephanie投球,以期稳中求胜。不料风云突变,Stephanie表现出前所未有的失常,投坏球远多于好球,让对方五度走步上垒,追平比分。Stephanie伤心得哭鼻子了。主教练不得不换回自己女儿凯娜继续投球。但最后又丢一分而失利。

周日上午的四分之一淘汰赛,蓝色精灵队与排名第六的科龙尼亚旋风队再次相遇,以六比二胜出。接着应战另一胜队,以七比三挫败排名第二的特拉华谷闪电队,进入冠亚军决赛,再遇桥水市黑豹队。凯娜与Stephanie各投了半场比赛。

桥水市黑豹队先声夺人,在第一局就频频得手,连赢三分,而且三垒都上满了进攻队员。面对严峻的局势,教练团队决定提早起用Stephanie,控制极为不利的开局。Stephanie再让一分后,击杀对手出局,以零比四结束艰难的第一局。

接下去的四局,蓝色精灵队一局一分慢慢地追,追至三比四。第六局,对方再下一城,拉开比分成五比三。剩下只有最后第七局的得分机会了。第一个上阵的击球手科妮,一改前几场频频出局的平平表现,出其不意地安打上到第二垒。接着上阵的是击球名单上的前几名队员。一个个象吃了豹子胆,不断击球上垒。等到Stephanie击球时,比分逼平成五比五。气得对方投球手甩球泄恨。对方不得不换新投手。蓝色精灵队再接再励,又下两城,以七比五领先。

轮到蓝色精灵队防守,Stephanie连杀三员出局,奠定胜局。场上场下一片欢呼雀跃声。赛后家长们都过来向我们和临危受命不负重托的Stephanie道贺。我也特别向科妮祝贺,感谢她在最后的进攻中首先打开得胜的局面。

今年春夏的比赛,Stephanie先后共得五个冠军奖杯,可喜可贺。尤其是这两个周末的最后决赛,无不波澜迭起,精彩纷呈,十分锻炼比赛与观赛人的心理承受能力。

Monday, July 20, 2009

月亮啊月亮

今夜,是人类首次登月四十周年纪念日,所谓宇航员一小步,人类的一大步。再等两天,是又一轮新月的开始,比较稀罕的是,包括中国在内的部分亚洲地区将看到百年不遇的最长近七分钟的日全食。

离地球大约二十四万英里远的月亮,其存在还真是某种天意或巧合。它挥动那无形的引力之鞭,一方面稳定地球自转时二十三度半的偏转,带来地上春夏秋冬的四季更替,当然这同时还有赖于地上奇迹之一的绿色植物对温差的季节反应;另一方面,与太阳合作,产生地上海洋的潮汐现象,给海洋生命带来没有死水一潭的生机,当然也给咱们戏水带来天然的巨型Jacuzzi(“极可意”)水流按摩。

你看它自转与公转的周期很接近,月亮基本上以同一副脸面对着观月的地球人。平均地日距离与地月距离的比值,以及太阳与月亮直径的比值,几乎都是四百倍。加上月亮公转轨道与地球公转轨道有间隙性的交叉重迭,如此造成日全食的可能(不然,不是月亮无法遮盖太阳,就是经常遮挡太阳)。而日全食带来的观天良机,加上太阳系在银河系里比较靠边的位置(好比坐在风景车的有利位置上),帮助上一世纪初的天文物理学家观察到星光弯曲的现象,证明爱因斯坦广义相对论的正确,至终揭示这个宇宙原来真有开始。而只要有开始,就带给我们理性的进一步深究:宇宙为什么存在?

深究一下,不外乎五种可能的答案。

第一,不知道。这答案固然响亮,但并没有真正回答问题。暂时不知也无妨,但月盈月蚀几百回,人生都快下岗时还继续保持不应有的无知,恐怕就缺少真智慧了。

第二,宇宙纯属偶然。我把这个说法叫理性的异化,因为一个天理精深的宇宙没有什么特别的理由就存在了。偶然原来是比自然律的必然还要铁定的最后原则。这是对理性的最大背叛与讽刺。

第三,宇宙在时间上是无穷的。言外之意,本宇宙有其无休止的前世,一直在大爆炸与大塌陷的无穷循环中。但既然星星还在发光,你正在有力气读我写的这篇博文,说明即使宇宙有前世,也必然是有限的。更何况,本宇宙正以加速度扩张,没有塌陷回来后再度爆炸的迹象。退一步说,面对一个有无穷轮回历史的宇宙,比之一个没有轮回的宇宙,并非就不再需要解释了。就好比说,你不能告诉我,因为咱们可能有无数位祖先,咱们就不用问无数位祖先是如何发迹开端的。

第四,宇宙在空间上是无穷的。本宇宙不过是宇宙海洋中的一滴水。是谓多宇宙论。我的挑战是,既然咱们不真知道天外有天,多宇宙就只是臆测了。就算有许多甚至无数个宇宙并存,咱们好奇的地球人总不能就不继续问下去:这多宇宙又是如何起源的?

第五,本宇宙乃受造而有。这是犹太教、基督教与伊斯兰教的共同宣告。而圣经进一步宣称,造物主曾经变成一个名叫耶稣的人,来到自己的地方,只是自己的人倒不接待他,把他钉在十字架上。人的堕落没有比这更甚的:按照神的荣耀受造的人,竟然没有认出造物主,也基本上很少活出神的荣耀。

有人挑战了:神又是哪里来的?

如果某某至终有从哪里来的历史,那我们的理性必然断定某某一定不是神!君不见,最后的选择其实不是理性的,乃是信心层面上的:是相信宇宙在时间或空间上具有自有永有的神性,还是相信自有永有的神创造了宇宙。

历史上曾经出场的耶稣,作为教会元首的耶稣,以及在人类末日要君临天下的耶稣,已经/正在/并将把宇宙的真理昭示天下。

咱们观月到底看到什么?或者,看见谁? 是三千年前诗人大卫所赞美的造天地万物的上主吗?请听四十年前首次登上月球的宇航员在月球上所诵读的大卫诗篇:

耶和华我们的主阿,你的名在全地何其美。
你将你的荣耀彰显于天。
你因敌人的缘故,从婴孩和吃奶的口中,建立了能力,使仇敌和报仇的,闭口无言。
我观看你指头所造的天,并你所陈设的月亮星宿, 便说,人算什么,你竟顾念他。
世人算什么,你竟眷顾他。
你叫他比天使微小一点,并赐他荣耀尊贵为冠冕。
你派他管理你手所造的, 使万物,就是一切的牛羊,田野的兽,空中的鸟,海里的鱼, 凡经行海道的,都服在他的脚下。
耶和华我们的主阿,你的名在全地何其美。

Friday, June 26, 2009

死亡啊死亡

一天走两个名人,还真的不常见。几天之隔,走两个名人,是有过的,比如香港回归后的那个夏末秋初,戴安娜公主与德蕾莎修女一周内先后谢世,着实让黑白分明的欧亚剧场认真演绎了两番生离死别的悲情。

查理天使之后发拉-福色特早上走了,六十二岁,死于癌症。歌王迈克-杰克逊下午走了,五十岁,死于心脏停搏(嘿!有不停搏的死法吗?)。两位名人活得都不到中国人所说古来稀的年岁。福色特死前不久才跟她儿子的父亲结婚。杰克逊留下了一屁股的债务(据说多达四亿美元)。唉!会过日子啊。死的时候,债权人都依依不舍。

名人的死,地球人都知道。君不闻,古狗搜索引擎一时间也应付不了网虫们的好奇。

我更关心的,不是名人的死(或者是谁谁谁究竟死定了没)。坦白些说,我更关心不出名的凡人之死。凡人数量大得惊人啊。屈指一算,地球人现时平均一秒钟死俩生俩(有疑问的话,去算算六十亿人口除以九十年苦短人生)。也就是说,一日二十四小时之内,有十七八万人走了,走得无声无息,绝大多数只有死者的亲朋好友知道。

人生不满百,常怀千岁忧啊。这么多的死人,死后都怎么个安置法?人真的一死百了吗?还是真有灵魂另去了一个世界?活人瞎猜死人的事,难免吃不准,除非有死人活过来如实通告那边的事情。

看来,死亡这扇门,非亲身经过而无从知晓门那边光景如何了。一想到某一天要跟自己的身体和亲人道别,心里还真有点那个。

但新约圣经里的保罗在监狱书简里宣称:我活着就是基督,我死了就有益处。

这不象是二十年后又是一条好汉的死前豪迈。如果耶稣真是基督,那不仅死人可能有救,活人也可视死如归了。

死亡啊死亡,你别狂傲。咱们走着瞧,看最后谁笑谁。

Thursday, June 11, 2009

冠军啊冠军

昨天傍晚,小女Stephanie的球队Phillies(费城人队,虽然不在费城)打败Dodgers(道奇队,虽然不在洛杉矶),赢得爱迪生镇10U(不超过十岁)年龄组的女子垒球冠军。这是小女加入镇内业余垒球比赛几年来首次获得此项荣誉,相当难能可贵。本季预赛从四月中至五月底,共赛十五场之多。Phillies以十一胜一平三负的好成绩,被定为第一号种子队,参加“疯狂六月”(June Madness)的双淘汰决赛,轮空第一循环,与另外两场比赛的胜者先后相遇,连赢两场,进入冠亚军决赛,再遇道奇队,以11比6取胜。

道奇队由经验丰富的翠西律师领军,过去几年带领她女儿的球队一直稳拿冠军。Phillies则由憨厚的史考特先生率领。据说史先生第一次当教练,在赛季开始之夜,兴奋无比,彻夜难眠。两个月来,每周平均两场赛事前都尽力坚持战前的队伍训练,保持高昂的斗志。充当主力投手的Stephanie与她的捕手(Catcher) Rebecca搭档陪练。从主教练到队员,敬业精神都令人钦佩。

话说小女的垒球技艺有长足的进步。她在两年前开始练习投球,球速节节提升,球路多变,有快速球,变速球,弧线球,坠落球。帮助本镇同年龄组的全明星队在去年Sayreville邀请赛中力挫劲旅东布朗士维克队而夺冠,回报前年铩羽而返的一箭之仇。上周打败爱市南队,获得市长杯。迄今二十场比赛中,投球过四十局,只让四分,故防御率(或自责分率,ERA)低于一,属于卓越投手级别。小女也是高打击率的击球手,多半时候都是安打上垒。预赛中与天使队交战中,打出她第一个本垒打(home run)。冠亚军赛中,她头两局两度二垒安打,打点(RBI)四分。对方投手在教练授意下,后来故意投坏球,让她走垒,免得击球成功而得更多分。由于小女出色的球艺,教练常安排她作一垒手,遏制对手轻松上垒。

当冠军固然光荣,但作为她的粉丝,深知小女备战训练的辛劳与汗水。咱不得不喊一声:Go Stephanie!

Friday, May 29, 2009

人生啊人生

死亡是如此的确定,咱们人类广大同胞似乎不得不默认了。君不闻,寿终正寝,算是好死。实在行不通,但求死亡的程序不要超过寿岁的百分之一甚至千分之一,不要太折腾而累人累己。但死亡似乎不跟人商量着办事儿。

想得开的,开开心心地过吃喝玩乐的游戏派对人生。想得不够开的,希望来个精神永垂不朽,于是一生忙着立言立德立功而立名。实在羡慕生命的,盼望来世享永生,于是在形形色色的宗教里找慰籍。最绝望而又不无洒脱的想法,莫过于一死百了,特别是惶恐于可能再度承受生命之轻,或者羞于面对任何形式的末日审判。

人活着到底有没有终极意义与价值呢?

我观看蚂蚁的作为,发现它们实在勤奋有余。厨房台面与角落,只要是与食物沾过边的地方,都免不了蚂蚁们的热情问津。我承认我的爱心有限,数周前买了据说能将蚁穴一锅端的人类发明。所幸,人类的广告多有夸大其词的。蚂蚁们不需要前仆后继,就继续勤劳地生活着。不仅在房屋内,户外的鲜花也不为蚂蚁放过。近日我难得得闲,又有不坏的心情,本来是想拈花惹草,观赏艺术家的新作品。不料,含苞待放的花朵,也有蚂蚁成对去光顾。我就好奇了,难道蚂蚁世界也有画地为牢的潜规则(此花已是名花有主,他人不得后发制人而占有)?或者鲜花的怒放也有赖蚂蚁之辈的功劳(说不定蚂蚁在细腻地按摩花朵,刺激花开)?或者蚂蚁世界正在闹经济危机,没有成熟的花朵也在嗷嗷待哺的蚂蚁们的时刻觊觎之下?或者蚂蚁赏花跟我看花异曲同工,皆纯属偶然,兴之所至罢了?或者是出于别的咱们一时或永远想不透的原因?我非蚂蚁,安知蚂蚁之动机?

我再看看浮华人生道场,发现大家都在为吃饱穿暖到吃好住好玩好而辛勤劳动着。但劳动还远远没有成为人的第一生活需要(共产主义的空想)。人的一生,对自己而言,好象是不停的换了一批又一批的原子组合。幸好原子们没有在换岗的时候把记忆带走,不然的话,此刻的我已经不是上一刻的我了。但原子集体罢工的时候,也就是咱们该歇息的日子了。人的一生,对世界而言,似乎也只是有限的暂时搬弄挪移原子而已。时间一过,曾经多少人为之贡献青春的公司也要名落孙山了。或者,有名有钱象“挨饿坎坷”(前克莱斯勒汽车公司总裁)在新的严峻破产形势下,也将失去养老金与一年开一部新车的优厚待遇,而过名副其实的挨饿坎坷的余年。这得怪他自己错误地估计了未来,以至当初把退休合同签成那样子。纵然咱们别替他操闲心,总得替自己和亲人着想吧。

响应旧约圣经传道书所言,该看的球还是得看,该读的书还是得读。这两件事同时发生,两天前的傍晚让我给逮着了。小女垒球打得有声有色。十四场比赛下来,投球只让了三分,只输了三场。某位妈妈手拿亚马逊看得儿(KINDLE),边看边读,向我和妻子介绍她的个人移动图书室,藏书最高可达一千五百册。新书上架,不过十刀,只需一分钟,就可以凭空下载。眼力不好,可以放大字体阅读。耳力不聪的,可以让书读给你听。我向她介绍中国古人写读竹简的传奇,都觉世界已然翻天覆地,不可同日而语也。我与妻子商量,看得儿应该纳入咱们未来的购买计划之内。

可兰经自诩道成圣典,圣经宣称道成肉身。两位先知,两本著作,两种信仰。等着你去阅读,去发现,去思考,去投靠,去为之生,去为之死。

Friday, May 8, 2009

母亲啊母亲

母亲节即临,我羡慕那些有母亲健在人世的朋友。

母亲走了两年多,留下的只有活生生的记忆。母亲第一次来美国探亲,是在我刚刚工作未满一年的六月初。肯尼迪机场,我隔着玻璃,翘首等候。母亲迈着还算硬朗的小步,跟着某位好心帮她提行李的的旅客,走出海关。第二天,岳母驾到。本来,岳母是来照顾即将出生的外甥女。母亲知道岳母要来美,就在弟弟的陪同下,从湖南到武汉去看望亲家。谈话中备受鼓舞,母亲决定去北京试试运气。回乡后,弟弟赶紧帮母亲办好护照等类文件,送母亲进京申请访美签证。老人家虽然不识中英文,还是顺利拿到了旅游签证。不料当时买不到与岳母同一天的机票,母亲就只好先一天抵达。

母亲不了解飞行线路。当我拿出地球仪,向她介绍飞机飞越太平洋的航程时,老人家满脸都是惊愕的表情。她说她宁愿飞在陆地上空,这样飞机即使落下来也比较踏实,不至于掉在深海里出不来。咱们没法要求老人家预先知道十八年后的2009年年初发生在曼哈顿河上的紧急着陆的英雄壮举。真稀奇,水上着“陆”比陆地着陆更踏实。

母亲对某些称呼的英文颇感兴趣。她问我答,她跟着学。比如,爸爸叫Father,妈妈叫Mother。老人家很快就发现卷舌的尾音一样。回想起来,我当初真该教她Dad(dy) 和Mom(my) 或者Papa,Mama来得容易。她接着问,姐姐妹妹呢?Sister。兄弟呢?Brother。老人家不满,说那比狗叫还难听!说得全家人都笑了。

有一天,母亲私下问我,我是不是非常富有。我吓了一跳。问母亲何出此言。她说她发现我在不同的银行取款机上都可以拿到现钞。她分析,一个能够在多处不同的银行都取得到钱的人,不可能不富有。我好奇,反问她,估计我到底有多富有?她伸了伸手指,少说也有六位数。我哑然失笑。为了让老人家信服,我掰开指头算了算,即使我来美六年不吃不喝不花钱,头五年当穷学生,每年的助学金寥寥几千刀,加上头年的工薪,也存不到那个数目。 老人家后来知道,取款机各地联网,方便客户。

老大终于出生了。老少五口,拥挤在只有两个卧房的公寓里。一天午休时间,老人家蹑手蹑脚,来到产后初愈的媳妇床边,轻轻地握起她的手,惊醒睡美人。临产前,婆媳间曾有一个情感摩擦,原来在晚餐桌上,母亲忘了给媳妇夹菜,反倒一个劲地替儿子夹菜。

母亲提意见了。说我们吃得太简单,生活水准远不如那时国内的高。在她老人家看来,餐餐吃大鱼大肉的荤菜,才算高品质的生活。老人家一辈子吃够了苦,没想到儿子去美国高就,日子过得并不那么爽。可不,等年底默克吞并咱们公司,不爽的日子还在后头排队来着。

最有趣的一件事,是母亲劝我早日海归,说是回国可以当很大的官。妻子好奇问,到底可以当多大的官。母亲直言,乡里亲人们都说,官不会比毛主席的小。这句话,成了我们家的乐子,也道出了天下父母心!

Friday, April 24, 2009

春天啊春天

春天埋葬了寒冬
为大地盗热暖身
春雨淋浴后从桑拿房走出
气质天然纯美的姑娘

她身披时髦流行的绿色长裙
呼唤没有污染的风能
吹动洒脱飘逸的秀发

化妆间的灯泡
是涂了颜色的郁金香
她在自己头上镶嵌一颗又一颗
宝石,玛瑙,苍玉
红的,橙的,黄的,蓝的,紫的
今年穿戴的首饰组合
跟往年的不完全一样

她是名副其实的年轻而富有
追她的人不在少数
从少年等到中年
从中年等到老年
最后化成泥去陪她
她一个也没有答应

Thursday, April 2, 2009

牛年啊牛年

牛年真牛啊。不服不行啦。理由有三。

第一,牛年开市不利,连伟大光荣不一定正确的噢爸妈总统(这是俺最近琢磨出来的一个好译名)宣誓就职的那天,也是狂跌不休。一时间,大有让全球股民没有喘息之机的末日危机感。一从事个人理财的朋友劝我清仓大甩卖,因为道琼会继续跌破六千甚至五千点。我听了觉得不对劲,便反问他,既然股市会一路下滑,那我如何安心地抛售烫手山芋而没有良心自责?如果大家都因恐慌而抛售,岂不加剧股市下滑吗?俺离退休还远(虽然公司不一定同意这一看法),不必急于保值嘛。因为有了包括咱们在内拒绝恐慌抛售的长线股民的安静合作,不人云亦云,不亦步亦趋,不瞎折腾,让发酒疯的股市在翻江倒海的狂澜恶流中摸底落实,寻机起飞。咱们不骗你,在愚人节结束的时候终于带来喜讯。G20(直译就是伟大的二十国)在是次伦敦峰会中,誓言同心协力,给世界经济注射价值一万亿美金的强心针。于是股市象吃了摇头丸一样,疯狂而直线地崛起,顶破道琼八千大关。咱们拭目以待,看股市是否需要看急诊。

第二,牛年是俺送长女上大学的年份。七所大学申请,终于见分晓,四一二开(四取一等二拒)。哥大不义气,咱女儿只好拿自己开心,上网向朋友们宣布加入失利者俱乐部。如今咱们仔细盘算,值不值得花大钱上大学。咱们不二法则很清楚,只是执行起来有些不容易:如果真值,卖房都成。听得出,咱们的房子在颤抖,因为这世界上哪儿找象咱们这样爱屋及乌的屋主啊。小草们也闻风而动,决定一夜长起来,弄绿了咱们前庭后院,说,冬日已过,春天即临,还是留守花园州玩不到一周就剪草的健身游戏吧。

第三,牛年还是俺泰山大人只使用过一次的笔名。盖因他老人家一生经历许多坎坷,来美探亲期间,克服无神唯物的另类信仰洗脑,在上一次的牛年(1997)里信主,于是结合他自己与他老伴的名字各一字,起名牛年(谐音刘年),写出精彩见证:顽石也能点头。

是的,不仅老顽石能点头,小顽石也能点头。这不,俺内弟与弟媳在牛年之初,效法俺老岳父岳母的信仰跨越,共同成为天父上帝的儿女。最近托人带给他一本新鲜出炉的更新版研读本圣经(应该是全中国第一本),据说他在短短两周内,就读完了达八成篇幅的大厚本圣经。不多几日的复活节主日,内弟与弟媳将受洗,双双归入三一真神的名下,向此世界与彼世界,向天使和魔鬼,向真神和假神,宣布自己的信仰与生命归属。难怪父子俩最近通电话时,半开玩笑说,父子既然同为上帝的儿女,也就是主内兄弟,可以称兄道弟了。好家伙,叫自己父亲是兄弟,真够胆大的。好在,信仰是自己的事儿,没有遗传,上帝也没有孙儿孙女。

Friday, March 27, 2009

三月啊三月

三月通常是立春的月份,象征春暖花开的季节就要来临。三月应该是充满希望的。但是,今年的三月,非同寻常。

消磨我青春的公司,三月初宣布,年底将被默克吃了。当然,在官样文章里,是我们的公司把默克给吞并了,只不过主动改名叫默克,而且让默克的高级管理来接管。难怪我的内弟在中国听到这一喜讯后,通过我妻子向我道贺。我不解,妻子释疑:十八九年后,咱们终于有机会翻身,换一家公司干活了。说不定,还能够捞个一官半职,高就了。我听了,喜忧参半。

喜的是,默克付的薪水比咱们公司高,即使不升官,合并后说不准有工薪统一调整,也能发点小财。忧的是,不一定有机会为新的默克效劳余生,更何况,在如今恶劣的经济恐慌里,老默克的员工不降薪就算他们的福气了。

在如此严峻的新形势面前,咱们该如何度年如日?

我想到了写作。毕竟这笔杆子还没完全生锈,脑袋瓜运转尚未失灵,何不发表一两篇自己关于明日制药的高新见解,即使新默克不赏光,咱们也可走着瞧,拿走那不算差的遣散费,过一段滋润的日子,说不定不久经济来个咸鱼翻身,有公司着急把咱们请回去,继续新药研发,也未可知。

实话实说,咱们小声耳语你,最怕的是,新默克不裁老忠实,硬是建议俺效法孟母的折腾之举,若不从则自行离职,到头来分文不取,成为待业中年。如今这年头,诸葛孔明不见得想得出的主意,都会弄出来折腾人。还是响应胡主席号召的好,少折腾,多和谐。以前是东方不亮西方亮,如今大有西方不亮东方亮的势头。此一时,彼一地啊。

三月就要过去了。是为本月唯一博文。签名画押为记。嘱咐自己:坚持不懈地生活下去。

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

冰天雪地 (Icy and Snowy Country)

假洋鬼子玩弄日本货
如同演双簧的醉汉
一歪一扭
冒着地毯式的轰炸
趁黑溜进白色
从街头到巷尾
每一根枝条都被拷贝
象是打上石膏固定
一动不动的模特儿
涂满面馍
熬夜等候明早
揭晓
是卸妆成原生态的热诚
还是继续显摆玉洁冰清的冷俏

Monday, January 19, 2009

Lincoln, King, and Obama

On this Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, one day before Barack Obama is to be sworn in as the 44th President of the United States, I feel like writing something as cheerful, though not as masterful or eloquent, as the 1963 "I Have a Dream" speech given by Dr. King, a pastor, a Nobel Laureate, and the anointed martyr for the civil rights movement.

Small wonder, Obama's presidential idol is Abraham Lincoln. Dr. King picked up what Lincoln had started a century earlier. From the Emancipation Proclamation to I Have a Dream, two milestones are sandwiching 100 years. The hard fought ideal of abolition movement set in motion the freedom of a beleaguered people of color. Not just any color, but the color of black, the God-given, dark-tanned complexion of the people of African decent. In the midst of the Civil War, Lincoln guaranteed Union-wide freedom of African Americans who were in servitude. It then took the spirited outcry and civilized decry of Dr. King and others to help end the racial segregation. Dr. King paid the ultimate price by pouring out his life as a drink offering on the altar of freedom's temple.

As if time is faster forwarding, forty years after Dr. King's assassination, Barack Obama won the Presidential election as the first African American, sealing a momentous victory in American dream and evolving Americanization.

Tomorrow, Barack will swear in with the same Bible used by Lincoln, under the gaze of millions of well wishers and TV/internet spectators, not to mention the ultra tight security details. A nation has indeed taken a giant stride by choosing a son begotten by a black father and a white mother. The once divided Union now finds its perfect harmony within one persona. Barack Obama epitomizes the age-long struggle for racial equality. It is now up for the new Obama Administration to deliver the message of hope, not in pre-election sound bytes, but in parcels of tangible benefits to millions of displaced and distressed people of all colors, who find it increasingly harder to put bread to their family's dinner table or get affordable health coverage.

We all bid him Godspeed. May the good work of Lincoln and King find fuller fulfillment in Obama and the innovative American people.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

感受中国四篇 (China Trip Reflection)

(一)天津篇

子弹列车快如其名,最高时速逾三百公里。短短25分钟,连通京津。微笑自如的乘务员,送给每个乘客一瓶来自西藏高原的矿泉水。

送给老人家的书,据说审阅过半。金融海啸,成了姐妹花饭前的议题。美国佬如今不得不谦虚学着点,恶补社会主义计划经济的课。中国人现时骄傲,看来不仅因为京奥。

充满乡音的主祷文,结束每日晨祷会。北方杂粮,是难得的养生佳品,填补时差挖的墙脚。

寒冷的步行街夜市,并不少游客光顾。赵四小姐对当时痛失爱子的少帅及时而多情的安慰,都陈列在早年宣教士开设的宾馆里。

狗不理的世纪承传,继续发扬光大,一个值五元。加上香酥的麻花,都由大哥他慷慨买单。

“市政府,国务院,帮帮您的子民”,巨幅请求高挂在大楼前,吸引路人的眼球。

据说某保洁工替某楼顶暴发户打扫完房间与厕所,染上黄山归来不看岳的综合症,恨不得把自家的寒舍给烧了。

不平等与心怀不平,是社会的一个写真。

(二)湘鄂篇

还给弟弟的钱,摇身一变成为我自己身上的衣裤。免债无论如何都是恩典。

父亲的坟,又爬满了敌不过星星之火的茅草。墓碑上的亲眷名字,被岁月之水洗得褪了色。母亲那边,还要再等一年才可树碑立传。湖北的姐夫,躺在自留地的下面,无声提醒那次越洋话别。

活着的人们,继续认真地花自己与别人的钱,洗头洗脚。唯物主义的国家,把身体保健提到了无微不至关怀每一个原子的细腻境界。心灵深处的呐喊,淹没在嘈杂的搞活经济的人流与物流里。

两位28年不见的高中同学,相遇在班主任老师的家里。欣闻另一位喜欢读书思考的同学,已经积极参加教堂的聚会。

初中生一天十三个小时在学校啃书本。周末还要补习(据说开补习课的许多老师平时学校上课多少留了一手,补习课本也需要到指定商店购买。师道尊严,了有新意)。上网一查,在美国的儿子郑重向他的朋友们宣布,他推迟写家庭作业。中美两个社会还真是两重天啊。

仍然逍遥自在过田园生活的三姐夫种的橘子,如今卖不出好价钱。理由让人很无奈,据称来自四川灾区的有些橘子,长了死人身上的虫。此橘固非彼橘,但消费者如何辨别得清。三鹿毒奶事件还未结案,吃得保守点总是上策。

(三)成都篇

胡主席访问灾区的日子(事后从新闻里才得知的),我第一次落步蓉城。还真是人杰地灵的好地方。咱媳妇小时就在那里呆过两三年。据表哥密告,如今的酒量,得益于儿时的训练。成都话,特别养耳,尤其是从屡次考倒我们脑筋急转弯的九岁小妹口中说出来。

研经与主日聚会,挤满了顶楼的公寓。从世界屋脊下来的弟兄,第一次见到准岳母。

宽窄巷子,旧貌新款。与大表弟一家坐下来,慢慢地品一杯让人晚上难以成寐的茶。容让配备放大镜的挖耳工进进出出,搬走一些本来就不该久留的垃圾。最妙的是,细长的挖耳工具还能发出悦耳的颤音。表哥与小表弟陪游景里,已然相当西化的天地。一东北来的大学生侍应,毕业后准备去广州谋生。剥茧抽丝,工序堪称一奇。丝绸果然来之不易。

公园里的出租小屋,摆了三具自动洗牌码牌的麻将机。算是平生首次看见这种已经几年老的高级玩意儿。七舅把屋子全天租下来了。三位老人陪我玩了若干回合,我手气不差,赢多于输。午饭后慷慨激昂解说福音奥秘的当儿,屋内花盆突然快速震荡了几秒钟(原来北川当时发生了四点九级地震)。小舅出人意料,晚饭中当众背诵主祷文。文革期间,他斗胆看禁书,包括圣经。劝他去教会,他自恃清高,说那里传得不地道。

一群基督徒矢志重建灾民的心灵,正积极调动远近各地的教会来认领参与。

跟川大学子谈论如同推石上山的生物制药的现状与前景,更喜闻年青人对福音饶有兴趣。次日上午专开一堂布道,并邀多位祷告接受主,表哥亦同祷在列,何等福气。

(四)北京篇

宴请五舅全家并新婚不久的表弟,以及清华读研的侄女,并分送福音书本与小册子。查证属实,全国各地家长给孩子的老师送礼不送钱,已经蔚然成风。

先后作客几位海归弟兄姐妹的家中。他们如同被上帝移栽的香柏树,为主发旺放光。

最后的晚餐上,见到一位24年未谋面的大学同学。他几年前信了主,在不同教会转了一圈,近入安息日会。席间由他率先巧妙开火,展开了一场神学之争。此行从教导护教开始,到实战练兵结束。

离京前,带领内弟和弟媳并家政(来自重庆的阿姨保姆)祷告接受主。中国之行,于是画了一个相当完美的句点。

我满满地带上亲人们的祝福(包括食品礼物),赶回来为妻子庆生,更为岳父母喜庆金婚。

About Me

Ph.D Biochemist, Itinerant Evangelist

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